We’ve Never Been Here Before

May 25, 2025

Letter from the Editor

Dear Reader,   Certain scholars have said that we need new literary forms to accurately reflect the anxieties of this generation. If you’ll indulge us in a navel-glance, this week the Nassau Weekly searches for a physical form that better … Read More

Verbatim

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Overheard at the Farmers Market.

Horny future politician: ”I could never sleep with a conservative.”

Overheard at an ice cream social.

South Carolinian: “I was living underneath the Confederate statues.”

Overheard in Green Hall.

CWR Professor: “Animal Farm is fine propaganda. Not literature.”

Overheard in an off-campus Apartment.

Bro 1: “They have Sabrina Carpenter in Fortnite.”

Bro 2: “Oh, shit. I’d buy her.”

Overheard in East Pyne.

The same SLA professor: “You need human suffering in order to experience genuine happiness. I mean, are we really going to just sit around all day and eat twinkies and call that happiness?”

Overheard in Tiger Tea Room.

Former child with an au pair: “It's because she wanted a child but she wasn’t pregnant so she got a horse.”

Overheard in Sakrid.

Girl with a nice smile: “I want to have the mouth that one has when they don’t have teeth but have dentures.”

Overheard in JRR.

Grad student: “You know how after you eat Dominos you wake up in the middle of the night with meat sweats?”

A confused me: “No? Keep that to yourself.”

Overheard off campus.

Public servant: “I like your multi-drug stuff… it feels like home, with Mexicans abusing things all around me.”

Overheard on Campus Green.

A prude: “I can be promiscuous too but at some point there is a line that is crossed that I didn’t even know existed!”

Overheard in East Pyne.

SLA professor: “Though I want to be entirely clear: just because you have back problems does not mean you are demonic.”

Overheard in photojournalism class.

Goof: "There's no content warning needed for these photos. I mean, they are representations of war, so."

Overheard in CoLab.

Boy from Connecticut: “The worst thing that could happen to me if I was reincarnated would be to be reincarnated as a poor person.”