Nasstalghia
April 12, 2012
Verbatim
More →Overheard outside Little
Sunglasses douche: Have you ever been in a class where you’re that guy who knows everything and everyone else seems like an idiot?
Overheard at Ivy
Drunk person: You should never ask for a blowjob. That’s like asking for a thousand dollar Christmas present.
Overheard at Terrace
Student using Siri: I want a joke about the Holocaust.
Overheard in Whitman
Sensitive lineman: You’re not funny, you’re hurtful sometimes...
Overheard at Ivy
Moron: She’s not a Theta, so socially she’s pretty much a nobody.
Overheard in Campus Club
Rhodes Scholar: Both the black Rafaels I know are black.
Overheard at Terrace
Bearded dude: I got strep throat from a long line of dicks.
Overheard on Google Maps
Disenchanted reviewer: Princeton is full of snobs! Besides the architecture of the school, the town has only 2 blocks worth seeing. The hospital is nothing like the TV show House, and no he does not work there! 4 blocks off the college is where the illegal immigrants gather and wait for day work. I was extremely disappointed in Princeton. I imagined a European type university village centered on a school with great prestige! Yeah, NO! not even close.
Overheard on spring break
Miami Beach denizen: The sequins on my bathing suit are rubbing against my crotch.
Overheard at night
P-Safe officer, exiting car, to other P-Safe officer (in a different car): What’s up mofo?
Overheard at dinner
Ivy junior: Why is the ALTA committee all Jews?
Ivy bro: It was originally going to be the Ashkenazi Life Total Assessment.
Overheard in Whitman d-hall
Dining services worker, on child discipline: You can’t have it both ways. Either you gon’ punish her or you gon’ whoop her.
Overheard outside Whit Lib
Sad guy: even if I don’t talk to anyone in the dining hall it’s still nice to remember that people exist
Overheard at men’s volleyball game
Basketball player: I don’t care what happens the rest of the game as long as that line girl takes the next one in the face.
Overheard on the Street
Drunk girl: I worked from 10-5.
Drunk dude spitting incoherent game: Better than 10-8.