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Byline: Charlie Nuermberger

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Letter from the Editor

My summer vacation felt like a body. Mine felt like a river. It’s generally useful to build up a number of unreasonably applicable metaphors that seem to withdraw profundity from just about everything. It’s the only way you’ll produce what … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on September 13, 2024September 14, 2024

Letter from the editor

You can read Hunter S. Thompson’s suicide note if you want but only on Genius Lyrics for some reason and only while 50jitsteppa offers up a studio performance of his track “I Know” in a concurrently playing video. It’s sort … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on February 22, 2024

Letter from the Editor

It’s absolutely true that this is the first time we’ve ever run a Halloween issue, and for a magazine as historically elaborate and artifactual as the Nassau Weekly, it’s a sort of mystifying reality. We scoured the dread tomes that … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on October 31, 2024October 31, 2024

We Added 200 Strangers on BeReal, and We’re Never Opening the App Again

“Hypothesis: people our age around the world are alone during a significant portion of their waking hours. And hypothetically, BeReal is the perfect observational device.”

by Charlie Nuermberger, Lucia Brown on November 20, 2022November 20, 2022

Sorry About the Air Conditioners Being Off: Townes Van Zandt, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and Aesthetic Signatures of Heat

A Nass writer sweats through readings of some outlaw country tunes and a splatter horror classic

by Charlie Nuermberger on February 22, 2024February 22, 2024

A Note from the Editor-In-Chief

The other week, a dealer–who up until this point had seemed demure and cryptically cosmopolitan in this very European way–messaged me, “In years past, I had everything all the time.” Me and my friends laughed for a while. Then, things … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on April 4, 2024April 4, 2024

River House, Part 2

The continuation of a tale of fish and memory.

by Charlie Nuermberger on April 10, 2022April 10, 2022

In Search of an American Original in Friday the 13th and Sleepaway Camp

A pair of Nass writers look for the Original across a pair of movies that have more than a dozen sequels between them

by Charlie Nuermberger, Isabelle Clayton on October 31, 2024November 1, 2024

A Note from the Editor-In-Chief

When people say spring has sprung, they actually mean it has emerged from inside itself. Spring has ejected from its own abdomen through a lovely, vulvic little déchirure in the side. The whole thing sounded exactly like you’d think it … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on March 28, 2024March 30, 2024

Letter from the Editor

One of the least nassholish ideas that I hold dear to myself is that, in the end, we will be delivered. Forces beyond our knowing care for us in ways that our slimy, underdeveloped sensory organs cannot appreciate so frequently. … Read More

by Charlie Nuermberger on September 26, 2024October 6, 2024

Telescoping Cavity

To telescope, we begin with 300 words, then slice the word count in half for each successive section. We stop when the numbers stop dividing evenly. This week, four Nass writers telescope the word “cavity.”   Charlie Nuermberger (cn0260) CW: … Read More

by Alexandra Orbuch, Beth Villaruz, Charlie Nuermberger, Daniel Viorica on April 23, 2023

Tales from the Village of Hommlet

“When I was young, I plunged a fork through Reason’s knee, and smote her atop a hill with electrical pylons.”

by Charlie Nuermberger on February 13, 2022February 13, 2022


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