Overheard in girl dorm

Hysterical: My PMS is getting to my ears.

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Overheard in girl dorm

Has hyper-flexible elbows: Women are so understudied. We have no idea what kind of weird muscles we might have.

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Overheard at Roma D-Hall

Homoerotic BSE major: Would you rather be gay or die alone? That's the question in front of me right now.

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Overheard in one of those study booths where you lock yourself in alone

Not-ready: A child is a time bomb!

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Overheard on a Tuesday

Medievalist, sniffling: My illnesses are vanquishing me.

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Overheard in sleeping structure

French AB: Can I disassociate with you? 

COS BSE: I have school.

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Overheard in Engineering Library

Fault-finder: She’s so riddled with religious guilt.

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Overheard at Terrace

Curly-haired Ableist: My cousin is 16, and she's really picky. At that point it's like, grow up! She's not autistic, she doesn't have ARFID…

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Overheard in frat house

BDE-BSE house-husband: Since we don’t run the heat, I have to cook and clean to keep the house warm.

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Overheard on Election Day

Mentally-ill: The real question here is who’s tapped into Peanut the Squirrel?

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Overheard in girl dorm

Judger of men: Bot…I would say.

Lover of men: Why is everyone a bot these days?

Judger of men: AI Era.

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Overheard in Tower

Struggles with words: I think I will likewise receive the same great pleasure.

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Overheard in Whig-Clio

Voted blue: I apologize for the dissonance in our humour cognition. 

Voted red: I’m not even going to bother looking up dissonance.

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Overheard in group chat

English-major: It’s called a joke with alliteration.

ESL: It did not land in our lands.

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Overheard in Little

Legal adult: I thought it was giggly.

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Overheard on Halloween

Angsty and topical: I would hook up with a ghost. You could see through their bullshit.

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Overheard after the clock strikes twelve

Anti-breakfast date: No one feels romantic before noon.

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Overheard at dinner

Prego©-matist: I want a sauce-focused pizza.

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Overheard in Bloomberg 044

Fabulous frosh: I’ve been told my hair is half my aura.

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Overheard in Coffee Club

Grad student who’s too into Tinder: You should always be with the one you’re eye-fucking.

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Overheard at Charter

Softie, drenched in their own spit: I can't believe he actually thought I was crying in the corner and never apologized and on top of that made fun of my country’s potassium production.

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Overheard in the HUM sequence

Renaissance man, lover of women, loved by many, feared by few, appreciated by all, hunk: A woman is like a bathtub. Drip, drip, splash.

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Overheard in PMC

Silver-liner: People in the cemetery don’t annoy you. Cuz they’re dead.

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Overheard in bunk bed

Follows their own religion: I think the dinosaurs are waiting for us in the afterlife

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Overheard over bean soup

Ex-communist: The way of making it in the Soviet Union was better.

American beauty: I hear that like seventy times a day.

Ex-communist: In the Soviet Union, we’re not rude to each other.

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