Übermensch Bench

September 22, 2017

Poor River

“Although the river and its people share the past, on this afternoon, the burden seems unevenly placed. The man whose socks are drying on the concrete can rest in peace knowing that his story has ended.”

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German Parody Party

“It was through squatting that Cörtlen developed an interest in radical politics.”

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Celebrating Community

“Thanks to Princeton, the opportunity was created for the students—but the rest? That’s on them.”

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Unfurnished Furnished

“These photos of Schisto from this past June depict two prefabricated housing units. The first set is an empty trailer just before new residents moved in. The second set is the trailer of Mohammed (pictured in the doorway) and his family.”

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A Lesson on Grieving

“The brush strokes the bottom of the eyelid first, then the center, then the edge. The tip of the eyeliner presses against skin that, with time, will begin to hold creases that resemble hers.”

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first love

“cicadas he dares not search for
but whose song fills him,
whose notes he knows well.”

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to the person whose bed i slept in one night

“we do not speak anymore, this person whose bed I slept in one night. seeing you reminds me of how childlike I felt, and I refuse to feel that frightened anymore.”

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Journal Square

“At the edge of Jersey City is a field of black dirt. For one stretch of the field, two rows of thin, yellow shrubs run along an idle road, planted without any intention for longevity.”

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Verbatim

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Overheard on Nassau Street

Journalism intern: You're a different person now.
Investment banking intern: I'm the same person. Just with more Excel shortcuts.

Overheard at Terrace Indian food night

Bridge year alum, yelling: IS TOFU EVEN INDIAN??!

Overheard in Wright

Princeton graduate, analyst: Yeah I really like my job! I had to teach some guy how to recycle yesterday and that was tough, but I really like it so far!

Overheard at Cloister

Banker: Are there any hot guys in your summer analyst class?

Overheard in Wright

Ivy girl/Reproductive Justice fighter: PHEROMONES!!!

Overheard at Lawnparties

Literary SWUG: I love having a youthful body. Even if nobody touches it, it's like, a museum piece.

Overheard in the Space Barn

Junior Slavic Major: My mom has this coupon for falconry…

Overheard in Laughlin

Woman: Hey, it's fine, you're not making out with his morals.

Overheard in a car

St A's junior, wistfully: T-Pain was my musical awakening.

Overheard on a Snapchat of a girl wearing a Cottage sweatshirt and beanie

Caption: are you actually homeless?

Overheard at a DC party

Journalist, incensed: are you slut-shaming Yo-Yo Ma?

Overheard at EPS

Ivy Senior: Eventually, all roads lead back to Greenwich.

Overheard in a public library

Man, humming: Dick so big it's like a foot is in your mouth.

Overheard in Studio 34

Tindering bro: I'm telling you, she was Catholic a month ago.

Overheard at Small World

Doppelganger of old man from Up: As I said, I am going to pester you about Instagram. I have friends from all over the world on Instagram! I want you to join me on Instagram.

Overheard in Pyne

Shere Khan senior: All I want is to be the kind of guy who is taken to the Met Gala.

Overheard in Murray Dodge

Junior Upper West Sider, looking at pictures of a Debutante Ball: I can't look at this. It's three child brides.

Overheard at Terrace

Yung Marxist: Honestly, the Great Depression is a seriously underrated event.

Overheard in a bed

Woman 1: It's crazy how easy it is to have a civil, friendly meal with people you profoundly dislike.
Woman 2, cheerfully: That's the magic of TI!

Overheard in Butler

Apes bro, scrolling through newsfeed: What are 5 foods that kill testosterone? If guacamole’s on this I'm so fucked.