The Dating Issue

November 14, 2024

The Dating Issue: Full Design

This week, we shacked up, settled down, and cuffed ourselves into oblivion

Nass List: What’s Your Type?

What’s our type?

Nassifieds

Reach out to thenassauweekly@gmail.com if any of these tickle your fancy!

Verbatim

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Overheard on Election Day

Mentally-ill: The real question here is who’s tapped into Peanut the Squirrel?

Overheard in girl dorm

Judger of men: Bot…I would say.

Lover of men: Why is everyone a bot these days?

Judger of men: AI Era.

Overheard in Tower

Struggles with words: I think I will likewise receive the same great pleasure.

Overheard in Whig-Clio

Voted blue: I apologize for the dissonance in our humour cognition. 

Voted red: I’m not even going to bother looking up dissonance.

Overheard in group chat

English-major: It’s called a joke with alliteration.

ESL: It did not land in our lands.

Overheard in Little

Legal adult: I thought it was giggly.

Overheard on Halloween

Angsty and topical: I would hook up with a ghost. You could see through their bullshit.

Overheard after the clock strikes twelve

Anti-breakfast date: No one feels romantic before noon.

Overheard at dinner

Prego©-matist: I want a sauce-focused pizza.

Overheard in Bloomberg 044

Fabulous frosh: I’ve been told my hair is half my aura.

Overheard in Coffee Club

Grad student who’s too into Tinder: You should always be with the one you’re eye-fucking.

Overheard at Charter

Softie, drenched in their own spit: I can't believe he actually thought I was crying in the corner and never apologized and on top of that made fun of my country’s potassium production.