Raising Interest Rates

November 13, 2022

Jane’s Addiction

“She saw eyes that enjoyed staring, ears that indulged in eavesdropping, and a mind that ruthlessly analyzed what her senses discerned. She saw hands that took these findings and selected food accordingly, cut food accordingly, chewed food accordingly.”

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Raising Interest Rates: Full Design

This week, the Nass gets its heart broken, writes fiction about disordered eating, and logs delirious entries in a Dream Journal.

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A Haibun for our Fallen Leaves

“Short breaths are suspended like smoke, naked against the frail air.”

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The Glass Cracked

When the glass on a train cracks, strange and impossible things reveal themselves to the protagonist in this speculative fiction piece.

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A Trip to the Orangerie

“In many ways my trip thus far had been haunted by Benjamin; every glimpse of the underground Metro lights, the carefully planned streets, the dimly lit bookstores brought some passage, some fragment of prose from his works to mind.”

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All My Dreams Wrapped Up in a Little Ball

Chaos reigns alongside Homer Simpson in this writer’s Notes app dream journal.

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Last Summer

“Fairy-tales like this weren’t supposed to be true. He felt that if he didn’t say anything, then none of it was real. And if it wasn’t real, it couldn’t possibly be taken away from him.”

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Cartoons

Some cartoons for your Sunday pleasure.

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Verbatim

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Overheard in a fight over astrology in Firestone

Wandering Theta junior: "I was conceived on 9/11, the day of America's greatest tragedy."

Overheard on Instagram

Drama aficionado: “A little sense of drama makes any misfortune manageable.”

Overheard on Nassau Street

Sagacious student: “I don't need a soulmate. I'm B.S.E.”

Overheard on Witherspoon

Romantic consultant to anxious roommate: “Think, but don't overthink.”

Overheard in lecture

Inquiring professor: Are any of you regular readers of "The Yacht Report”?

Overheard in newspaper room

Enlightened editor: “If you want a man at this school, you gotta date lower.”

Overheard in dining hall

Student eating dinner: "I recognize the value in edging."

Overheard at late meal

Concerned friend: "You're gonna cry that day no matter what, so would you rather do it while having great sex, or alone in your room after a quasi-date?"

Overheard on the way to Roma

Girl on the phone: "Don't get married right now!"

Overheard at a dorm postgame

Riled-up interrogator: "Name one semi-casual restaurant in Princeton that you'd take a friend-turned-lover to right now!"

Overheard during the World Series

Curious Californian: "Hey Siri, what pronouns does the Philly Phanatic use?”

Overheard while procrastinating

Mom friend: “Okay, continue about your bike accident that I don’t care about.”

Overheard while studying

Revolutionary: “I truly want to fuck the framework.”

Ally: “I thought you were ace, bro.”

Revolutionary: “I meant fuck UP the framework!”

Overheard in New College West

Exasperated student: “I don’t party. I'm FSI.”

Overheard in an Uber

Personal finance guru: “I might just sleep all day so I don’t have to pay for food.”

Sage Lakers fan: “Mamba mentality.”