A Treatise of Human Nature

November 12, 2017

Rupi Kaur Has Been MEME-IZED

“For this particular Rupi Kaur phenomenon, is there something inherently wrong with that? We enjoy the shell of the Rupi Kaur meme, the humor it offers. In return, she enjoys the proliferation of her work.”

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Zara Autumn-Winter 2017

“One writer explores the depth of her affection for Zara’s wholly original, totally inventive, brilliantly designed autumn-winter 2017 shoe collection.”

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#what’s love

“They say love is accepting one another as is, marveling at the imperfections and delighting at the quirks.”

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The Case for Unionization

“Knowing that both parties in a negotiation have real bargaining power militates against paternalism and ensures the mutual accountability and respect on which goodwill and collegiality rely.”

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Missing From June

“I miss my brother’s 18th birthday. He spends it kneeling in pews and tossing crosses of stems and swallowing Christfuls of dirt. No one falls into the pit. Oh, adult. Fresh mint.”

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Life as Art

Nietzche class is not a safe space—everyone is welcome, but aesthetes be warned.

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Induction

“But looking at this sunrise, I realized I had missed the magic of so many past ones with my expectation.”

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Close

“Matter warps that geometry.
So I try to piece her together like he would.”

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Verbatim

More →

Overheard at Princeton football game

Politics major, on Cornell band halftime show: Oh my god! This looks JUST like the North Korean mass show.

Overheard on campus

Former Nass-er: Is that a real book?
Nass Junior: Yeah.
Former Nass-er: Oh, so it's not fiction?

Overheard at NYU

Senior NYU girl: We're both artsy. But I'm, like, aesthetic artsy, and she's, like, DIY-artsy.

Overheard in Canada

Prince editor: What is student journalism if not gossip?

Overheard in Ivy

Frat pledge: This is the first time I haven't worn a street to the shirt and I feel fat.

Overheard in the library

Senior girl, reflecting on Kant: The next time I'm making out with someone on the street, I'm going to ask them, excuse me, do you see me as a means or an end?

Overheard at Ivy

Socially conscious bro: Self-immolation is morally wrong because it contributes to global warming.

Overheard by the Woody Woo Fountain

Nass writer, holding a philosophy textbook: I'm morally opposed to getting a nose job … but I could see myself doing it ironically.

Overheard at Ivy

Ivy Gear chair, venomously: I love seeing people in Gucci slides at Ivy

Overheard in the Prince Office

Daily Princetonian Opinion Editor: Marcia, I can't possibly get a job at a news organization.

Overheard in Whitman

Sophomore Pi Phi, referring to a class at Gratitude Yoga: Gemma asked us to lift up Puerto Rico at the end of class today. But I said fuck that, I'm gonna lift up my mom. She needs it.

Overheard in Bloomberg

Confused frosh, on local psychic: She won't “do” you… I mean, she won't “read” you unless you're over 18.

Overheard in Nass Office

Nass Frosh: I’ve been listening to Ira Glass talk about storytelling, so I feel really qualified to write about this.

Overheard outside Firestone

Unidentified freshman male: Yeah I could join the Nass so easy. I'd just be like, "La Croix," and they'd be like "Fuck yeah!".

Overheard in Spelman

St. A's Ivy Senior: I don't know if I would shower with her.
St. A's Senior: Because it's a public shower? I've done it.
St. A's Ivy Senior: No, because that's me time.

Overheard in a Nass Meeting

Frosh, wearing bright red tracksuit: We had a vape photoshoot yesterday, so let us know if you want any pictures.

Overhead in Causes of War precept

Student: Yeah I heard that in North Korea if you're a government informant you get a free rice cooker… or a TV or something.

Overheard on Reddit

Philosophy major: Oh good, he's an undergrad, not a grad student. Now I feel more comfortable telling him to go fuck himself.