Unlikely Hellfellows

September 28, 2006


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Overheard in Edwards

Guy 1: Have you ever had phone sex?
Guy 2: Why would I want to listen to her bitch at me while I jack off?

Overheard at the United Nations

Hugo Chavez: Yesterday the Devil came here. Right here. And it smells of sulfur still today…I think we could call a psychiatrist to analyze yesterday's statement made by the president of the United States. As the spokesman of imperialism, he came to share his nostrums, to try to preserve the current pattern of domination, exploitation and pillage of the peoples of the world. An Alfred Hitchcock movie could use it as a scenario. I would even propose a title -- The Devil's Recipe.

Overheard at the Values Voter Summit

Jerry Falwell: I hope she's the candidate. Because nothing will energize my [constituency] like Hillary Clinton. If Lucifer ran, he wouldn't.

Overheard in Harlem

Hugo Chavez: Bush is an alcoholic, a sick man with a lot of hang-ups.

Overheard at a frat party

Guy 1: What year are you?
Guy 2: I’m a junior
Guy 1: What club are you in?
Guy 2: Terrace
Guy 1: Oh you’re an indie kid! I can tell by the way you dress. I’m an indie kid too!