Let’s Get Lunch

November 21, 2015

Conservative Anti-Intellectualism on Campus

A recent editorial in Princeton University’s most conservative publication, the Daily Princetonian, predictably dismisses all of the demands made by the Black Justice League during the recent protests against racism on campus. But what is surprising, not to mention embarrassing for the University, is the anti-intellectualism expressed by the editorial board members.

by on

Telescoping Place

places you have lived, places you know better than anyone else, places in your mind, places you could inhabit, what it means to exist within a place

by , , , , , , , on

Grimes Engineers a Pop Star

In 2012, Grimes proclaimed that she was sick of her own voice.

by on

Thesis Advice from Freshman Charlie Cohen

Jerk it to work it, baby.

by on

Metal Transcendence

Calling an album “transcendent” is like saying a book is “interesting.”

by on

Princewatch

The Prince’s problem with reporting suicide.

by on

The Disenchantment of The Magician’s Land

When I explained the class “ENG 210: Princeton University Reads” to my mom over the phone after registering for courses, she responded, “That sounds like an expensive book club.”

by on

Princeton Lives, Princeton Wives

I decided to figure out what it is about Princeton that made so many couples want to get married here.

by on

Oxygen Holocaust

Photosynthesis is a sexually transmitted disease.

by on

Verbatim

More →

Overheard

Theta sophomore: I lost a diamond earring in a boy’s room last night.
Pi Phi sophomore: Well, sex loosens all your holes.

Overheard in Chancellor Green

Senior woman, to senior woman, on night out: He never texted me back...I was forced to make out with a lost Wiffenpoof instead.

Overheard outside TI

Middle-aged man, to bouncer, indignantly: I was secretary of the class of '93. Do they not have me on the list?

Overheard in New York

Exasperating man, to new acquaintance: I just want to connect with you on Snapchat because I really value your perspective.

Overheard in the Edwards bathroom

Man’s voice wafting delicately from the shower stall: Hush little baby, don’t say a word...

Overheard in Little

Consultant: What are we talking about—athletes?
Leftist Jew: Hitler.

Overheard in TI

SAE Senior: I don’t understand this “black zone.”

Overheard at Nassau Sushi

TI Theta: I called PSafe on a pregame last night. I’ve never felt so old.

Overheard at Nassau Sushi

TI senior: I’m already stressed out about my children’s education.
International senior, pragmatically: You can adopt a fully educated child.

Overheard in 1901

Strategic senior: Worst-case scenario, someone steals your jacket and you Uber home.

Overheard in Wilcox

Sophomore to senior: I didn’t know you were, like, that into the Holocaust.

Overheard in Richardson

Laverne Cox: It’s so hard to find men to date who aren’t patriarchal.

Overheard in HIS 448

Professor Grafton, on history event: I don’t get to cross-dress. I’m deeply disappointed.

Overheard in East Pyne

Professor to undergrad: I hear what you’re asking. But you need to ask yourself, is that a serious question?

Overheard

Pi Phi pledge: Fuck, it’s 2015.

Overheard in Brown

Cap junior: Honestly, British imperialism is pretty alluring.

Overheard in 48 University Place

Sophomore boy: I have a question: how do I go around and ask people if they’re from Africa?