This week, the Nass recycles beer cans, interrogates TikTok feminism, and decides what good art is.
Boyfriend: There should be a cooking show where everyone moans.
Baseball player: You could die like now. Sometimes I think about that during the day.
Other baseball player: *silent, pensive nod*
Junior on vacation: Just played blackjack with a BILLIONAIRE.
Junior on vacation, forty minutes later: Peep the mani/pedi.
European grad student: We might need an alternative, yes, but if they're not selling crates and barrels at Crate and Barrel I will be VERY disappointed.
Freshman: I miss when Brandy Melville was body-negative
Frosh, scrolling through phone: "I should major in Instagram reels."
Desperate international students: “Who do you love the most?”
UK/US Passport Holder: “I'll marry ALL of you!”
Guy: “What are you guys going to be for Halloween?”
Girl 1: “I need a prompt, what’s relevant right now?”
Girl 2: “We could be geoexchange whores. Or the ghost of Poe Field?”