Nasshole Freakly

September 26, 2024

Nasshole Freakly: Full Design

This week, like most weeks, the Nass looks inward.  Find a copy around campus, or click the link here to view the full design!

A Horse Walks Into a Bar

A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says, “Why the long face?”   “Well,” the horse says, “it’s my life.” “What about your life,” the bartender says, “What’s the story?” “That’s just it,” says the horse,  “I don’t have … Read More

Verbatim

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Overheard in Cottage

Social chair: I remember when I tore my groin, she was helping me tape it, and I was like you’re taping my fucking balls.

Overheard while walking to the Street

Spanish & Portuguese major: Every matter is homosexual because covalent bonds. I don’t know how I got chemistry involved in this.

Overheard in Dod Basement

Jewish Democrat: Time is a block that grows in two directions.

Overheard while talking about cars

Traumatized: As the youngest, I’ve been in many trunks.

Overheard at Graduate Student Welcome Event

Hormonal undergrad: Shopping for a boyfriend here.

Overheard in the Fitness and Wellness Center

Gym-bro: Creatine makes me so bloated.

Gym-bro’s bro: It’s like one of those things if you’re turned on enough you can be into anything.

Overheard whilst lounging on Cannon Green

Super-super senior: I might have to violate the honor code to get one more semester.

Overheard in journalism seminar

Change-maker: Everyone in this fucking school has a sister named Gigi. People need to stop having sisters named Gigi.

Overheard in Firestone at 11:40 pm

Bathroom revolutionary rousing their fellow studiers: Don't misuse the bidet!

Overheard at Wawa

Hopeful student: I mean, an associate’s degree technically counts, right?

Overheard at Small World

Poet with shoulder-length gray hair: I received my quantum physics for beginners book. It crows about the fact that it does not contain math. That troublesome stuff. It's like reading a list of ingredients on fruit juice and finding it does not have high fructose corn syrup.

Overheard in dining hall

Linguist: I can’t tell if he’s gay or South African. If you saw him or talked to him once, you’d get it.