two things are unique                to a home:

writer’s block and wetting the bed. in sleep

 

my adult teeth pushed       each other

from my mouth like dominos. you held 

 

me, a wrinkled fetus         with long hair–

we can laugh at that. but really, you held 

 

old jeans like a plea. my stomach bulged

from the fabric              and i forgot why

 

we took turns     apologizing.

 

/

 

whenever my sister wants to play 

a board game, i say     i need

 

to write. actually   i scratch out

my hair and watch videos of celebrities 

 

kissing           in the next room. i crawl

to her bed when i’m sure she’s crawled

 

to yours. in a false dawn        you nestled 

me to your stomach, so i feign deafness 

 

as you open the curtains. 五分钟走1, you

snap.           in haste, i paw everything

 

out of my underwear drawer–

 

/

 

i never wrangled our knocker to choke

your screaming.         instead i sprawled 

 

on the porch, winced at how even wood

whined under me. the time you waste 

 

in driving me has dribbled 

down my chin, reaching for taste. mom

 

we whittle this house      

to a pyre.         tonight

 

my mouth has dried raw and i’m sorry

i taunted you   for this:

 

we’ve locked our keys in the new house. 

your jeans in my closet are     moving.


  1. Wǔ fēn zhōng zǒu – “we leave in five minutes.”

Ziyi Yan is a contributing writer and poetry section head for the Nassau Weekly.

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