Merry Christmas!

December 7, 2006

Single and Desperate

Daring, bold 5’9″ Jewish M with extreme good looks has decided not to be daring and bold by placing an ad for a similarly attractive F, height < 5'8". Think Annie Hall for a better looking, more bold and daring Alvy Singer. If you don't know what I'm talking about, it might not work.

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Shit I’ve Been Doing

I know, I know, I haven’t written in a long while, but I wish for Chrissakes you’d stop yammering on about it. I have obligations, obli-fucking-gations, and there’s no getting around them. If you think for one second that I’m … Read More

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’Tis the season

So the people on your Christmas/Hanukkah/Winter Solstice Festival list don’t get much out of pants covered with embroidered geese or yet another Overpriced Princeton Memorabilia Item™ from the U-Store. Maybe it’s time to look around for some alternatives – without … Read More

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A Modern-Day Houdini

Tickling the teeth, the tongue, the lips, Dr. Rabinowitz-Drillstein would jab various metal objects into my mouth during my visits to his dentist office. Though the majority of dentists will have at their most depressed of times the faint scent of Scotch or some strong digestif, my humble tooth doctor lacked this characteristic, and quite mysteriously so.

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Museum Briefs II

I. “Cézanne to Picasso: Ambroise Vollard, Patron of the Avant-Garde” at the Met Investing Vollard with the almost statesmanlike title, “Patron of the Avant-Garde” is pretty generous for someone Paul Gauguin once called “the worst kind of crocodile.” Maecenas he … Read More

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Strangelove at Christmastime

And you can feel it coming every year. Thanksgiving morning on the train tracks, you can feel it trembling, Christmas in transit, mere moments until it knocks you sideways and leaves you for dead. It isn’t that I don’t like … Read More

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Richard Nixon’s Legacy Lives On!

I had never seen ping pong look so good. In fact, before this Saturday, when the Princeton Table Tennis Club played Peking University’s team, I had never even seen competitive ping pong played before – excepting a few scenes in … Read More

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The Hidden Bob Dylan

There is no real place to start or stop with an artist like Bob Dylan. A hummingbird of the mind, he has flitted from style to style over the years and chances are that you could fall entirely in love … Read More

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Verbatim

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Overheard in Terrace

Guy: Why is there tinsel in your hair?
Dude With Tinsel in Hair: 'tis the season! 'tis the season!

Overheard in Pyne

Drunk Guy: Think about homicide - you're not really killing a homosexual, you know?

Overheard in Holder

Girl: If you could rape me in a paddle boat, I would give you props, cause that would be really hard.

Overheard outside Gauss

Frosh: So you're telling me you are going to contaminate all the condoms in the world and make your own army?

Overheard in the Nass office

Looking at pictures of assassinated JFK
EIC 1: He was awfully handsome.
EIC 2: Even in death.