Hyundai Funday

April 21, 2019

Silent Dawn

“The early afternoon lured more cars on the road. The drive to home because slower and slower. The air was dewy with heat and silence, and they all say boiling in the hot, stinking sun.”

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Loyalty and Affinity: Questions from the Jussie Smollett Ordeal

“To what extent do or should we believe victims? How much does identity play a role in the privilege of belief? Which institutions have the integrity to be moral authorities?”

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10 Types of Voters

“There’s the old adage, “know thy enemy,” or in this case, “know thy political sparring partner.”

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No Angel Knows

“At the top of the platform I turned left. The flat surface of the hemispheric bubble sprawled below. In my memory, the red chairs looked like rock candy.”

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Nass Recommends The Tsar of Love and Techno

“This novel-in-stories traces the lives of multiple generations of characters from the early days of the Soviet Union up into the near-future, all interconnected by an obscure nineteenth-century painting.”

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Joy

She shrivels in a spotlight or a gaze, / shy in all her glory, / scared off by expectation.

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Verbatim

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Overheard in Bloomberg 044

Former junior editor: David Foster Wallace is a pretty insightful guy.

Overheard on Prospect

Pre-frosh: Yeah, we just went to Tiger Inn but everyone there was asleep.

Overheard in Walker

White girl: Oh my god, why are you licking?

Overheard at Cafe Viv

Wawa frosh: I can't eat fruit on campus. I have to go to the local farmer's market every Sunday.

Overheard at Thai Village

Earnest foodie: Is crack vegan?

Overheard in RoMa

First-year, thoughtfully and earnestly: All my friends at other schools are getting hazed right now, and, you know, it'll kinda be cool to be part of it

Overheard at Boston College on Marathon Monday

Washed up athlete, reminiscing: Yeah, he was an alcoholic... so that was cool.

Overheard in 1927

Woke ORFE bro: The Honor Code is essentially denying evolution.

Overheard on a path outside Bloomberg

Visibly upset girl, walking alone: Man, fuck the Catholics! God damn it!

Overheard in Stone

Ivy COS Senior, delivering goodies to the poor thesising seniors: I feel like Marie Curie. Oh shit I mean Mother Teresa... the two most important women in my life.

Overheard at TI

Bro, chugging beer: Everybody looking at me like I'm a bitch but I've just got sensitive teeth.

Overheard in an anthro course

Professor: I’m not anti-capitalist, but I am anti- radical inequality due to the structure of bourgeoisie capitalism.

Overheard in New York

Girl: When my mom got drunk she would wave lighters in my friends' faces and tell them not to get pregnant.

Overheard at Ivy

Incoming MS investment banking intern: When I was little, I loved the smell of cash.

Overheard at a USG meeting

Macedonian: You don’t hear Undergraduate Student Government and think, “this is something I want to join.”