Irrational Cupid, Rational Man

I like to ask long-term couples where and how they met—always a good remedy to a boring conversation. My best friend met his wife through friends. After the second date, they knew they were going to get married.

The Road to Confidence Goes through Cancun

I’d seen the shows and the movies. I’d been there three times before. I’d even written a play that took place there. But nothing really prepared me for my trip to Cancun this Spring Break.

Italy Sans the Gypsies, Whores and Pickpockets

Attending Spettacolo! is like attending any number of Midwestern dinner theaters—the crowd’s mostly composed of silver-maned pensioners, the actors’ accents are comically bad and the plot is full of slapstick, “audience participation,” and a high degree of fuzzy-wuzzyness.

Hellboy

I really want to like Hellboy. Not only is it based on a comic book, it’s also about a monster-fighting demon, government cover-ups, and occult Nazi magic.

Poems

Dear Julia, our discussion regarding why ants
can lift up such relatively massive bits of plants
was inconclusive. So was our fitful tête à tête.

Encomium Morae: A Declamation

Given Princeton’s academic rigor, I am appalled to see that it lacks any formal instruction in my divine art. Rather than forcing tomorrow’s brightest minds to learn my science on the streets, I have resolved to outline a few basic principles.

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