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Category: Humor

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Public Service Announcement

The following is a message from the Colorado Springs Safety Council, a proud mountain western affiliate of The Nassau Weekly. This is your safety spokesman, Melvin R. McGinnis, speaking.

by Melvin McGinnis on February 14, 2013March 22, 2013

Read Receipt Manifesto

I, a frustrated child of this generation, nursed on, yet never quite weaned off of Technology’s teat, decry the current state of Digital Communication.

by Elizabeth Lian on December 6, 2012March 22, 2013

The Nass’s Classes

Real class -> Playful pejorative THR 201 : Beginning Studies/Acting -> “Shows for joes” ENG 206 : Reading Literature: Fiction -> “Plots for twats” POL 210 : Political Theory -> “Rules for tools” EGR 194 : Intro Engineering -> “Screws for Jews” JRN 445 : … Read More

by Eliot Linton on December 6, 2012March 22, 2013

Confessions IX

Am I handsome? There are days when my face is clear and my hair all in place and I believe that I am very comely, and there are days when I am unduly scruffy and pimpled and I despise my own reflection. I

by Ted Garmizo on December 6, 2012March 22, 2013

A Short Imagined Monologue By A Guy Trying To Trick A Student To Prox Him In In Order To Break Into A Dorm And Has Prepared For This Moment By Hanging Around Frist A Few Days

“Listen, I just got in on the Dinkory…”

by Dan Abromowitz on November 28, 2012March 17, 2013

Notes from the Reichling Family Fridge

Private Safety alerts.

by Will Mantell on November 28, 2012March 17, 2013

The League of Shadows

Types of ivy.

by You-You Ma on November 14, 2012March 17, 2013

The Romney Boys, Remembered

Brothers of Jared.

by Dan Abromowitz on November 7, 2012March 17, 2013

Missed Connections

Recollected.

by Elizabeth Lian on October 17, 2012March 22, 2013

More Finite Jest

The end of laughter.

by Eliot Linton on October 17, 2012September 7, 2013

100 Better Ways To Spend The $75,000 Now Being Spent By The USG On Their Signature Orange & Black Ball:

(Which Three-Hour Ball Consists Of Gymnasium Drunkenness, Middling Food, And Middling Music)

by staff on October 17, 2012July 21, 2017

Rage With Romney

Mitt Romney praying and drinking.

by Dan Abromowitz on October 12, 2012March 17, 2013


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