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Byline: Samuel Bollen

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Death Grips “Hot Head” Track Review

“Hot Head” is not only an assertion of power but also an investigation into how power works.

by Samuel Bollen on February 10, 2016October 2, 2016

Interview with Lester, Functional Humanoid

She looked at me and turned her thingie off. And said typical. And then turned over and kept vibrating.

by Samuel Bollen on April 16, 2016October 2, 2016

Manscaping

Before my senior year of high school, I had relegated the concept of manscaping to metrosexual metropolises like New York and Los Angeles.

by Samuel Bollen on March 7, 2015

Why Imma Do Me

Homer, homogeny, and the timeless value of individualism

by Samuel Bollen on April 26, 2015April 26, 2015

msg 2 my ghost

ghost,

im chasing u round the attic. u lead me round my attic, over chintzy 50s carpet, circumnavigating staircase well b/c u r scared 4 me—wild ghost chase? but there r many floors & rooms here & our friends r at a party in the next room…

by Samuel Bollen on August 11, 2015August 11, 2015

Weird Vermeer

When I’m trying to be cool talking about my intersession I tell people I was visiting friends who are doing a gap year in the Capitol (which is technically true), but mostly I was hanging out with my aunt and going to art galleries.

by Samuel Bollen on February 14, 2015

Country Shit with Granddad

When I was seventeen I went duck hunting on a lake in the backwoods of Tennessee with my grandfather and uncle.

by Samuel Bollen on December 6, 2015December 6, 2015

How to Write a Pitchfork Album Review

Listen to two or three of the songs off of the album. Pick them from different sections, so it seems like you listened to the whole thing. Also, don’t call them songs. Call them “tracks” or (even better) “cuts” instead.

by Samuel Bollen on September 26, 2016October 2, 2016

The Nass Reviews Flaked

This show is like the less-funny, homosocial version of Love except there’s still chicks in it and dudes who are bad at talking to them.

by Carson Welch, Samuel Bollen on April 3, 2016October 2, 2016

A Not-Sonnet

Chamomile tea gets me off More than getting me off does See also: girls laughing at my jokes & 90s video games   Can we go back to your place? Sure, but only if you’re down To smoke dope & … Read More

by Samuel Bollen on February 28, 2016February 28, 2016

The National Enquirer’s Daddy Issues

About a month ago I watched a Netflix documentary on the founder of the National Enquirer: Enquiring Minds: The Untold Story of the Man behind the National Enquirer. As it started, I saw that the production was nothing special—mostly voiceovers … Read More

by Samuel Bollen on March 15, 2015


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