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At Your Service
NW: On the topic of religious holidays: Yom Kippur, Day of Atonement. For the Princeton students, is there anything you must atone for? [Pregnant pause] JW: Caring too much.
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A Conversation with the Editors
Ca: I think we need to have a talk. Cb: What about? Ca: I didn’t actually call you in here to take a shower. I called you in here for something else. Cb: What’s that? Ca: I called you in here because I think you have a drinking problem.
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A Nass 100 Introduction
Over a lunch of pizza bagels, a fan of this very paper was asked to explain the Nass 100. “The Nass 100 is this thing that the Nass does every year where they like list one hundred things they never want to see again and like 33.3% of them are super funny.” Well, we are…
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Beginning the Year Properly
Instead of the usual how-do-you-do, we’d like to tell a story. There once were two bears. Both were young and happy; both led pleasant and fulfilling lives. Or so they thought.
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From the Editors
Two-hundred and fifty seven days, folks. Two hundred and fifty-seven. Let it roll of your tongues—257—it won’t be long now.
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From the Editors
Welcome Pre-frosh! Congratulations on your acceptance to [one of ] the most selective college[s] in the Ivy League!
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Squashed Together
“We definitely weren’t the favorites going into this,” senior and captain Casey Riley said. “But we pulled it out.” Riley wasn’t exaggerating. The women’s squash team, by many counts, was not the favorite to win this year’s Howe Cup.
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Sweet Humps and Bumps
It was a dark and stormy night in a town that knows how to keep its secrets. The pavement was slick with forgotten promises and the air rank with dissolution and ambiguous morality.
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Letters
Characters U S Scene 1 Lights come up on a sitcom-style living/dining room/kitchen set. It is reminiscent of I Love Lucy. U, a large foam letter is sitting on the couch nursing a cup of coffee. S, another large foam letter, stumbles in looking pale and hung-over (as possible as it is for foam letters…