We’re no longer collectively, psychically compelled to impose the old narrative on our news stories. Instead, in our state of informed, liberal, post-Katrina injustice-seeking, we’re reading for the other story. We’re reading for the story that shows our sensitivity and also reveals the depravity of the privileged classes, and maybe also diagnoses a generalized ‘what’s wrong with America’.
This article flows from a simple assumption. Barack Obama will be elected the 44th President of the United States, and on January 20th, 2009 he will assume said office.
I found this curious invitation nestled in a medium-sized cardboard box in Mudd Library. A middle-aged man with a likeness to Frank Zappa had wheeled a cart over with this box and three others just like it into the musty reading room where I was conducting my research after hearing that my grandfather, who graduated in 1937, was a part of this group.
“The pods are designed to wash your clothing and maybe even scent them with subtle lavender, not to satisfy an uncontrollable sweet tooth or the adventurous eater in your family.”
__WALL STREET: MONEY NEVER SLEEPS__
Having been cryogenically frozen at the end of _Wall Street_, Kirk “Michael” Douglas has returned to wreak havok on this new, technologically advanced century with ’80s know-how and slick suspenders. As any movie buff would know, this premise is a direct rip-off of _Jason X_, the one where Jason kills people on a space ship instead of next to a lake.
Human connection is beautiful, but one must remember not to dampen that burgeoning fire by committing
the greatest sin of all friendships: forgetting a name.
Looking back at my week out of the country, I realize that, of all the uppers and downers that passed through my body, the most effective drug I took during my spring break was the Snake’s Nest itself, a place … Read More
I always wanted a twin. I wanted us to dress in identical outfits and play tricks on our teachers. I wanted to have a crazy psychic bond and a secret language, and I wanted to feel pain when my twin … Read More
“A museum setting might sterilize the dread of the inevitable ending at which any chronological exhibit explicitly in conversation with environmentalism must arrive. But the accessibility of this juxtaposition right up front makes sure one is clued into that inevitability and made to feel it violently.”
