Friend who breaks under moral pressure too easily: This is a mark on my conscience that will never leave. These lies have stained my soul.
Prank co-conspirator: … It was just an April Fools joke.

“When she closes her eyes, the sun remains a white spot in her vision, and she can romanticize the eye damage.”

H.R.1, known by many as Trump’s “One Big, Beautiful Bill,” promised higher taxes on college endowments and has pushed private universities like Princeton to cut budgets this fall. But looking beyond the university, some of the bill’s greatest impacts will be felt by New Jersey’s public education system.

“He reached out again to the metal, which seemed to bend out towards him too, its soft surface embracing his hand once more. The chain rang out again in the cold, cutting wind, which swirled around him.”

“Behind my chest-thumping bravado and my snarling, reactive solipsism, it was apparent that I had reached a nadir: consumed by my own suffering and all of my ineffectual attempts to ‘better’ myself, I had begun to lose fundamental parts of myself.”



The Nassau Weekly got schooled on free will, so we’re feeling…conscious. Aware. Does the footnote section get to have an opinion on free will? Oh, I’m hearing that we don’t. Oh well.

Tired, exhausted, spent. Atlas fails, his shoulders relax, the mighty stone slips, and goes tumbling. It scratches the land, denting the mountains, before crashing into western sea. He stands there trembling, covering his head. – He waits a day. But the sky isn’t falling. Liars! he sneers, stretching his ruined…



“She imagined the dalmatian loved humans more than he loved dogs. She imagined him to be obsessed with fetch, to be the sort of dog who’d pause dinnertime to pick up a tennis ball. She imagined him to be sweet, to love scratches behind the ear and to snore when he slept.”

Students review Sakrid Coffee Roaster’s curious Pecan Pie Latte: Delectable or disgusting?

“The longest recorded chess match was two hundred and sixty-nine moves, over twenty hours. Mine has drawn on for three fraught years now, and it still persists.”

Aboard the Six Thousand Ship, employee testimonies put the question of humanity on the forefront, disguising this philosophical inquiry within the mundane bureaucracy of workplace testimonials.

In my dream I was making you pasta & nothing bad had happened to us yet you smiled and told me you would take these multivitamins & forget me. In my dream I booked a flight to wherever you were & my visa expired as I stepped out the door so I unplugged the…
Friend who breaks under moral pressure too easily: This is a mark on my conscience that will never leave. These lies have stained my soul.
Prank co-conspirator: … It was just an April Fools joke.