ERICA: In terms of my feelings in regards to the forthcoming political elections, it seems only right that we should vote for Obama and Biden, who are Democrats.
MEGAN: Okay. While I respect your choice, and appreciate your coming to me and telling it to me, I feel that our opinions differ on the point that I believe everyone should vote for McCain and Palin, the Republicans.
ERICA: Why do you feel that these candidates are the right candidates to elect in the election?
MEGAN: Well, I feel that our nation right now needs strong voices in order to further carry independence that I personally feel myself is important to the self-pride of America.
ERICA: Okay, Megan? I agree on your opinion about how America needs self-pride. However, I believe that the self-pride of America can be better brought by the candidates such as Obama, because he cares about the environment and also said something the other day about educating people of different classes, which I personally believe is an important factor within today’s role of being within the presidency role in America.
MEGAN: Okay, well, I appreciate your approaching me about this and having an honest conversation when you tell me your honest feelings about the situation. However, in a time of–and it sucks to have to say it, because it’s so scary about the world, but I have to say it–when there’s us in a time of war, basically, is what we’re basically in right now, to be honest, it’s important to feel that you have the necessary protection against the people who keep wanting to fight with us.
ERICA: Okay? I agree? I support Obama?
MEGAN: But you can honestly see Obama fighting for our country instead of fighting for other countries?
ERICA: Actually, Megan, yes, I do believe that I can see that, because with all of the problems in our world today, such as the war you mentioned, and such as money, and such as other bad factors such as global warming and poor people and sick people, I feel that Obama can probably definitely help us to fight those things because when he talks it’s very evident that he gets how important those issues are.
MEGAN: Yeah, but that’s the same with McCain, and also, he was in one of the wars–not this war, one of the wars before this one. And he’s been around for so long, so he definitely knows how to handle
important American issues as well as important issues not only in America.
ERICA: That’s another issue I feel is important to raise up in terms of the discussion we’re having between each other about these politics in regards to our opinions about the political election. McCain is so old. He’s like, older than my dad and your dad combined. Do you seriously think that he’s not too old to not die if he does or does not become President?
MEGAN: Um, Erica? Old people don’t just die all the time. That’s a very popular misconstrued misconception about them. It is so hard to watch America not understand the most important issues about America, like all of the problems in the world such as killing people and poor people, because the only important issues about America that they care about are age. My grandpa is 73 years old, but he only died once last year.
ERICA: Yeah, but Megan? How would you feel about Palin becoming President? Like, actually?
MEGAN: Well, first of all, I don’t think she will become President ever, because of my previous comments that I mentioned before about how McCain won’t just die because he’s old. But, also? If she did become President, I think that she would be a good leader because she has a lot of kids.
ERICA: So?
MEGAN: So, in order to be a mom you have to know how to be a leader, like a leader to your family. Unless the dad is the leader of the family, in which case you have to know how to be a good wife and mother, still. So.
ERICA: That’s not about world leading. Also, that’s very sexist, because I think mothers can be other things besides mothers and wives. They can be leaders, too.
MEGAN: Right.
ERICA: But look. I’m going to be the first person to say this, but just because she’s a woman and I don’t want to vote for her doesn’t mean that I’m sexist. Do I think she’s a woman? Yes. Do I think she would be a good leader? No. Do I think that’s because she’s a woman? No. Would it help her chances if she were a man? Depends if he was hot.
MEGAN: Okay, point taken. But have you ever seen her when she’s speaking about important issues? She’s really good, like, she definitely knows her stuff.
ERICA: Could you be more specific as to how you feel this is the case? This election is not about choosing between little things like, “Good morning, should I chew Orbit Sangria or Orbit Mojito?” It’s about bigger things, like “Should I let these people die today?” And, “Should I sign the Constitution?”
MEGAN: Like, she was talking before, I think, about how you need to make quick decisions as a leader when you need to make a decision about something? That is so true.
ERICA: No, Megan, that’s not always true.
MEGAN: Um, yeah, Erica, it is.
ERICA: No, Megan, it isn’t, because what about that time when you were drunk and decided to hook up with Jay just because he was the only single guy in the house?
MEGAN: Um, Erica? I don’t know if we’re on the same page here, but I’m talking about the political election in regards to decisions about our country. That’s not the same thing as hooking up with a guy.
ERICA: Whatever,
MEGAN: Plus, even if it is, that means you would make the worst president ever because of all of the decisions you’ve made that weren’t representing a good decision-making ability in regards to how you make your decisions, and choices.
ERICA: What do you mean? Could you be more specific in terms of what you were just accusing me towards?
MEGAN: Like you made the decision to hook up with Evan even though you knew that he still had a crush on Amanda.
ERICA: So what?
MEGAN: So, I appreciate your coming to me and telling me that you feel that I made a bad decision during which I hooked up with Jay, but it takes one to know one.
ERICA: Okay, Megan? I’m finding it very difficult though, as a person, to feel the need to justify my actions towards you about small circumstances and situations such as the one you just mentioned about me and Evan in regards to Evan and Amanda, but I’m actually trying to be mature here, politically.
MEGAN: Look, Erica? I think that while I continue my conversing with you about such things, I should also keep reminding myself that I’m talking to someone who has openly disrespected me in private when she thought no one was listening.
ERICA: I think that you might be acting insecure about who you’re picking to be president because you realize that they are underqualified, namely, McCain and Palin, and also because you’re getting chubby.
MEGAN: Okay, Erica? You’re starting to get aggressive towards both me and my personal body. And even though you think I’m immune to comments and insults on your part towards my body from you about how you think my body looks, you’re acting very contagious if you believe that your words don’t affect me towards the way that I look at my body on myself while I’m evaluating it from a personal level.
ERICA: I think that you misheard me. I wasn’t calling you chubby like on your body. I was saying that in terms of how you look at your candidates. Chubbily.
MEGAN: A lot of people in this house think that the way you approach ideas is stupid. And honestly? If you choose that it is your right to be bitchy and chubby, then that’s your right, okay? You’re an
American, just like the rest of us non-immigrants. Feel free to vote for whatever unpatriotic, celebrified candidate. But you should probably stay away from me for a while. Because now I’m just flat-out
pissed at you.
ERICA: At least I’m not a bitch.
MEGAN: You’re a bitch. At least I’m not a bitch.