Mass Hysteria

March 27, 2022

Mass Hysteria: Full Design

For the fourth annual Women’s Issue of the Nass, women writers and artists reflect on home, nourishment, motherhood, and embodiment.


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Overheard in MOL lecture

Professor (showing COVID variant data): “And this is what I call the T.I. cluster.”

Overheard during study sesh

Student checking Canvas: “Remember when it was check Blackboard?”

Peer, dreamily: “I was just on Blackboard today!”

Student: “Are you okay?”

Overheard in 1901 hall

Ally to women everywhere: “Imagine not wanting to be a pussy. Pussies are strong. Right? Feminism.” *high five*

A woman: “What?”

Overheard at a birthday

Kink shamer: “If I had to guess who had the highest chance of being a furry in this room…”

Suspect Friend: “Pet play is NOT furrying!”

Overheard in lab

STEM twink: “This is very, very complex. There's a lot of phosphorylation, bestie.”

Second twink: “I was gonna say ‘just like my bussy’ until you said the second part.”

Overheard at dinner

Forbes resident: “My carpet keeps getting me sick.”

Overheard in Scully

Animal activist: “I miss the mice.”

Exterminator: “Why?”

Animal activist: “There's not enough life in my room.”

Overheard after class

Food critic looking at a bubble tea cup with an ungodly amount of toppings: “That's a fruit salad. Get a spoon.”

Overheard in lecture

Tech-inept professor: “Come on, I just don't know how to get rid of YouTube avocadoes!”

Overheard in dorm

Sore sophomore: “Foam rolling your ass? Exquisite sensation.”

Overheard in Palmer Square

Mother to her tiny son: “Okay, so hiding in a trash can? I need you to know that’s a terrible idea.”

Overheard in RoMa

Undecided major: “Squatting is the new vaping.”

Overheard in lecture

Jovial politics professor: “That's a quote from my favorite investment banker—my ex-wife! Haha.”


Overheard at Tuesday late meal

Sauntering Vote100 fellow: "Are you in the Humanities Sequence?"

Friend: "Why do you ask?"

Sauntering Vote100 fellow: "Because you were typing and you looked worried."

Overheard in Whitman courtyard

AB student: “Cosmology? Isn’t that just like beefed up astrology?”