Cottage-Core

September 26, 2021

Cottage-Core – Full Design

This week, the Nass drives home, knocks on doors, and mourns the loss of a promising young writer.

Verbatim

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Overheard at the U-Store.

Two homies holding hands while leaving the U-Store: We came, we menaced, we left.

Overheard on Poe Field

A Professor Trelawney-esque, slightly tipsy girl: Wait, let me put “time to emotionally process” on my Google Calender.

Overheard at Edwards

Couple that is too comfortable with PDA: I'm like exfoliating your nose with my nose

Overheard in front of Frist

Future dictator: I was thinking about applying to the honor committee so I could know what it feels like to be corrupted by power.

Overheard at Scully

Desperate Bully: You look like a vegan!

Definitely-not-a-vegan: I look… healthy?

Overheard in dining hall

Sophomore, ebulliently, to passerby: Hey! How are you? We need to catch up!

Turns away: I hate her.

Overheard in Rocky Dining Hall

Sophomore male: I actually really like feet.

Overheard in Whitman Dhall

Econ Major Boy: Don’t come crying to me when you get robbed at gunpoint for your cat.

Overheard in a Nass Meeting

Frosh: You guys seem kind of quirky.

Overheard near Whitman

Two macho athletes, riding one electric scooter together.

Athlete 1: Dude, no, stop grabbing the handlebars. Grab my waist.

Overheard in Little

Friend who was asked for advice: Well does it have anything to do with your paper?

Tangent-loving friend: Bitch, don't writing center me.

Overheard in suburbia

Mom: Another thing I have to stop is my subscription to Willy Nelson drug tea.

Overheard at brunch

Pensive junior: These relationships are – what’s the word? – anemic.

Context: Overheard in Wilcox

Philosophy Major: I was going to, then I thought, 'Do I really want to watch a video on ontology right now?'

Overheard between old buddies

Judgmental redhead: She’s completely benign, and that’s what sucks about her.

Crossword

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