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Wondering Why?
Dear Wise Wendy, I can’t reach the top shelf in my house, but I need to get something out of it! What do I do? From, Shorty with a Problem
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Ardently, Maddeningly, Gloriously Tempted
All men lusted for the firebrand they called Flaming Tina, famed for the molten fire in her hair — and for the hot temper running fierce through the noble Scblood of Lady Valentina Kennedy. Forced into marriage with the fearsome warrior of an enemy clan, Tina vowed to use her wild beauty to gain mastery…
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A letter to my TI lover
Dear Guy from TI the other night, aka Mike, aka My Love, My Love, My Love, What the hell happened? I’m so pissed at you that I can’t even talk to you about it face-to-face. Also, I can’t find you, which makes it harder to talk to you face-to-face. Isn’t this weird? I’m pissed at…
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A couple of things to consider when picking classes
I know you’ve heard it, or, if not, then you’ve felt it somehow, sweeping through the dorm room hallways, rolling around Café Viv, and whirring past kids on their way to Firestone. There is a buzz in the air, and no, it’s not the bees or the wind that’s making that sound. I’m talking about…
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Why Princeton students are like flowers
I went up to a girl who was yelling so loudly and excitedly that I thought I was in an episode of America’s Next Top Model right after the model-hopefuls have found out that they’re going to some foreign country, like Africa or Spain. “What’s the commotion?” I asked as we stood in front of…
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Georgia, Seen From Ukraine
For Poland, Belorussia, and Ukraine, then, Russia remains a hungry, imperialist bear.
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Debate Scorecard, Part III
HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN—GEORGE BUSH “[T]his is a final verdict on the failed economic policies of the last eight years… that essentially said that we should strip away regulations, consumer protections, let the market run wild, and prosperity would rain down on all…
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Hipsterotica
Jo was sitting behind the counter of Beacon’s Closet in Williamsburg. Her friend and co-worker Cathey was working the register and telling Jo about her most recent purchase at Strand Bookstore in the Village: “It’s like an annotated version of A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, but instead of just writing about…
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Debate Scorecard, Redux
WICKEDEST CENSORS—CNN “Hey, can I call you Joe?” she asked. “[Off-mike],” he responded. BEST MIXED METAPHOR—SARAH PALIN “The barometer there, I think, is going to be resounding that our economy is hurting.” MOST GERUNDS—SARAH PALIN Gerunds are for the weak, remember that. AN UNBRANDED RANGE ANIMAL—JOHN MCCAIN That’s the definition of ‘maverick’, you know. THAT…
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The Sins of My Father
In an election where both candidates for President profess a faith that teaches a preferential option for the poor, it is lamentable that there has yet to be a real discussion about equality in American society. As has been the case for the past five election cycles, we continue to engage in a debate that…
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Servicing the Nation
Several weeks ago, a number of students received an email about a group of Bronx middle school students who wanted to visit Princeton. The idea was simple: at-risk students might be motivated to stay in school if they could see the fruits of years of academic labor. Unfortunately, only a few days before the slated…