- What is Cap Love?
- How can I improve my relationship with my mother?
- what’s ur dick like?
- You’re Jewish but your name is Christopher… is that weird for you?
- Have you ever hooked up with a student? Be honest.
- Which one(s)?
- Are you circumcised?
- Is your wife circumcised?
- Can you use the word “titillate” in a sentence?
- Can you use the word “titillate” more often?
- Favorite character in Cloud Atlas?
- What are you doing to improve socio-economic diversity at Princeton?
- Am I lovable?
- Are you lovable?
- How can I improve my relationship with your mother?
- Ever read verbatim?
- Am I an empirical kid or an organization kid?
- Yes or no?
- Who, what, where, when, or why?
- How many?
- How about now?
- How about now?
- What’s the tallest you’ve ever been?
- What’s the highest you’ve ever been?
- What’s the highest point on campus you’ve jerked it?
- When was the last time you used your physics education?
- Do the ‘80s ever call looking for your glasses? Zing!
- Do you even know what a provost is?
- If you were a Buzzfeed quiz what Buzzfeed quiz would you be?
- Work, play, sleep. Pick one and you have to do it forever.
- Describe yourself in 14 characters.
- Describe yourself with 14 characters from Cloud Atlas.
- where the weather machine at LOL srsly
- What is the most expensive thing you have ever put in your mouth?
- Seriously, what’s your dick like?
- Are you on Tinder?
- Do you get your own bathroom?
- Do you even have bodily functions?
- Do you love this shit?
- Are you high right now?
- Do you ever get nervous?
- What’s your record number of likes on Instagram?
- Will you follow me on Twitter?
- Which animal would you trade skins with?
- Which fruit would you trade skins with?
- Is it ever annoying when you ask Martin Mbugua for his opinion on an outfit and he refuses to comment?
- Are you familiar with the term “dad jeans”?
- Are you my real dad?
- Would you describe your style as “normcore”?
- What’s delicious?
- What’s your fave syllable?
- When was the last time you cried?
- Who’s the most attractive person in Ivy?
- Who would you retro-hose?
- Is this all just too much?
- Do you even lift?
- Are you hitting on me?!
- Why does the financial aid office believe that family contributions can increase every year?
- Am I the first non-USG member to come to Office Hours?
- Are today’s undergraduates more nubile than in the 1980s?
- Are you a feminist?
- Where is the Asian-American studies department?
- Whose dick do I have to suck to get a capitol internship around here?
- Whose did you have to suck to get a capitol internship around there?
- Was it worth it?
- Can you please approve the creation of more co-ops in support of the radical notion that students could actually eat affordably?
- Can we divest, already?!
- How the hell did this shit happen? Oh baby.
- What’s the “F” in Terrace F. Club stand for?
- How do I get off the Nassau Weekly listserv?
- Tell me one fun fact about yourself?
- Has the list closed yet?
- Can I be your plus one?
- Is it members only?
- lets go 2 terrace? ?
- hey you up?
- Do you think your son is really yours?
- Can you make Princeton dismantle its effed-up mental health system and build one that is actually in the best interests of students, like, yesterday?
- How does it feel that Shawon Jackson has been President longer than you have?
- Does he look like a bitch?
- Then why you try to fuck him like a bitch?
- What’s your favorite?
- Are you afraid you’ll be impeached?
- Do you know what St. A’s is?
- Fine. How about the 21 Club?
- Okay, but I bet you’ve never heard of the Nassau Weekly?
- How’s your prostate?
- Would you rather never see your family again or see them again?
- What advice do you have for aspiring presidents?
- What advice do you have for someone looking to sleep with a president?
- *long pause* Is this a date?
- Did you even look at what my favorite word was when you let me into this place? What about my math SAT score? If I told you what either of them were would you kick me out? No, you probably would.
- What happens in Prospect House? Does it involve blood?
- What is up with that pipe outside Firestone emitting smoke that smells like vanilla?
- Do you know undergrads call the statue that memorializes the tragedy at Kent State “The Blowjob Statue” because we are literally only just barely worthy of calling ourselves “human”?
- IS IT IN YƟU?
- r u wet?
- James Franco has a Ph.D. and you do not? Are you a moron?
- Do you really feel qualified to be running a university?
- Don’t you feel that James would be a better fit for this position?
- Do you have any questions for me?