Book recommender: It’s about the whole idea of the gym. After break-up, you go there to create physical pain to ease the mental. Tall, blond man: Sweet, I’ll read it this weekend whenever I start feeling too happy.

A dreamer, gazing at the stars: Would you go to the moon? European: I wouldn’t even go to fucking Wyoming.

Beleaguered freshman: If you see tear stains on my test, just assume they were tears of joy.

Kinky Whitman/Butler frosh: I’m going to Butman Dining Hall…

Hot senior, again: What did that mean? Was that like a PewDiePie quote or something?

Hot senior, groping apple: You look like an AI-rendering in the New Colleges.

Beautiful girlfriend: I thought you liked me for my personality. Realistic boyfriend: It’s okay.

Social chair: I remember when I tore my groin, she was helping me tape it, and I was like you’re taping my fucking balls.

Spanish & Portuguese major: Every matter is homosexual because covalent bonds. I don’t know how I got chemistry involved in this.

Jewish Democrat: Time is a block that grows in two directions.

Traumatized: As the youngest, I’ve been in many trunks.

Hormonal undergrad: Shopping for a boyfriend here.