Math Major in the Midst of a Game of Codenames: Is pie cylindrical?
Astro Major: Have you ever *seen* a pie?
Abuser of narrative: You’d be shocked to hear this — I rarely have dreams about murdering people.
Loving firefighter: I don’t think it would be good for you to consider this flame.
A smiling ball of black stares back at me.
But when she turned to pet him, her hand brushed against a thousand tiny legs scuttling away into the shadows, leaving her utterly alone.
He failed to become an enormous insect.
In the corner, the rocking chair began to rock.
I only started to feel right again--to feel whole again--when I turned to less artificial sources of calcium: Greek yogurt, sesame seeds, finger bones, teeth.
Mandible-ist: I’d put my appendix under my pillow to get my wisdom teeth back.
Materialist: I’d put mine under my pillow for a Birkin.
Neurotic NYT follower: Let’s check on Eric Adams.
Has a senior thesis to write: Bro. Do your homework.
Fifth-wave feminist: If only every man was as supportive as this Amazon customer service guy. He’s like a dog to have in the room!
Accidentally seductive: I was imagining a little brother relationship.
Observant onlooker: Well, did you see that way that ‘little brother’ was dancing with you?
Pulls no punches: She had horrible B.O. She STANK. She probably cuts up a lemon and rubs it all over her armpits.
Denim-clad iconoclast: I already know her. I don’t define people by their DFMOs.
Low-brow: What really gets her riled up?
High-brow: Beautiful, beautiful men exhibiting immaturity. And intimate colonization.
Comp Lit HAG: I was about to get pissed that a couple was all lovey dovey before I looked up and saw it was 2 guys.
Math major: Can I get a different basketball? This one is too oval-shaped.