Changing of the Guard
March 1, 2020
Verbatim
More →Overheard at a coffee shop in town
TI member: This year I accidentally threw beer on a crowd of parents.They need to be ushered into the new future.
Overheard outside Frist
Upset sophomore: The fact that they took Supervillain Island off of Poptropica is literally a hate crime
Overheard in Whitman
APES Boy to a table of APES Boys: Dude! You gotta sous-vide the eggs to make an eggs Benedict!
Overheard in Spelman
Astute observer: Being white is like vodka— you don’t drink it on its own, but it mixes well with everything else!
Overheard at Terrace
Graduating senior: I love Ambien so much… Can't wait to finally have my own prescription one day.
Overheard in Wilcox
Sophomore libertarian: Mitt Romney is a hottie with a body.
Overheard at Vegan Shabbat
TI Senior Male: How would we all be racist if we were colorblind?
Overheard in Holder Basement
I used to do the crossword. Now I don't have time because I'm always sucking dick.
Overheard on Blackboard
Content added: Lecture 6 — Cocaine Arrives
Overheard at 1AM
Confused Pi Phi: Wait, is Bridge Year a personality trait?
Overheard in Neuro Institute
Disembodied voice, heeled shoes running down the hall: ESMERELDA!!!
Overheard in Wucox:
Bewildered sophomore: What is the difference between The Daily Princetonian and The Nassau Weekly?
Overheard in TI
Nass Editor: The conservative in me is gonna come out…
Overheard in Terrace on a night out
Adventurous Sophomore: Does anyone wanna play strip monopoly?
Overheard on Frist 100 level
Smug Sophomore: I'm writing an essay for Creative Nonfiction about a mathematician's relationship to chalkboards.
Overheard in Seminar
Tenured Comp Lit Professor: I hate to dramatize, but it's the end of the world.