Two-Hump Gumption - Nassau Weekly

Two-Hump Gumption

October 13, 2012

This Disorderly Campus

“Fuck Public Safety” and public space.

by Grace Hack on October 12, 2012March 17, 2013

Peaches and Penumbras

Independent life and the lesson of Ginsberg.

by Joel Newberger on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Two Poems

Things you have lost to the wind:

by Matt Brailas on October 12, 2012September 7, 2013

Confessions III

Magnetic fields.

by Ted Garmizo on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Repeating the Past

Modernist nostalgia at Princeton.

by Neil Hannan on October 12, 2012March 17, 2013

Crystal Castles

The stacks’ crystalline mysteries.

by Giri Nathan on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Rage With Romney

Mitt Romney praying and drinking.

by Dan Abromowitz on October 12, 2012March 17, 2013

The Casual Vacancy

The disappointments of J.K. Rowling’s newest.

by Rachel Wilson on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Masterful Viewing

Anderson’s The Master reviewed.

by Rebecca Zhang on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Honesty II

A parable towards Commencement.

by Rafael Abrahams on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

The Princeton Runway

Bothering half-celebrities, severely.

by Bennett Alvaro on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Murray-Dodge is Nothing

Murray-Dodge has substance and is not empty.

by Jared Garland on October 12, 2012March 22, 2013

Costumed Tragedy

Reenaction.

by David Drew on October 12, 2012March 17, 2013

Verbatim

Overheard in Frist

Unkind undergraduate: Her stomach is so immense that it doubles over into testicles.

Overheard at Cottage Snapback and Tattoos

SAE Sophomore, about temporary tattoo: I’m gonna get disinherited because of this shit.

Overheard in the Sewer

Ivy Senior, gesturing at TI girl: Is she an officer?
TI Senior: No, just a slut.

Overheard in 1937 Stairwell

Analytical Drone: You’re eating trash pizza! You’re in a bad place!

Overheard in Lewis

Guy, after he’s caught leering at Girl’s breasts: Uh, is that a Stan- ford sweatshirt?
Girl: (Wearing high school sweat- shirt.)

Overheard in Senior’s Inbox

Career Services: INVITATION FROM YOUR CAREER COUNSELOR: On behalf of the Office of Career Services, I would like to welcome you to your first year at Princeton!

Overheard on iPhone

Logistician: I’m an architecture student, of course an iPhone 5 is a ‘necessary school item’, Dad. Unfreeze my shit!

Overheard in Library bathroom

god is dead--nietze [sic]
NIETZE [sic] IS DEAD--GOD

Overheard on Twitter

Egyptologist: The Arabic word for ‘text’ is ‘Nass’.

Overheard at Nass Meeting

Nass Editor, questioning premise of ‘Canadian Thanksgving’: Ok, but Thanksgiving is, like, the celebration of Columbus’ discovery of America, right?