The Soft Issue

December 1, 2011


More →

Overheard in Butler Basement:

Boy: I don’t like to snowboard and act like I’m black. I like to ski and be white.

Overheard in Wu:

Toolish COS major: I’m gonna go upstairs and study in Jane Street Library. I mean, J Street.

Overheard outside Studio 34:

Bro among bros: I can’t wear backwards hats. Some people just have the face for it... I just have a long face. I can do cowboy hats, though. I have a cowboy face.

Overheard on Theta email list:

Thetas: Be opened minded.

Overheard at Occupy Princeton:

Protestor: Does anybody know how to work a computer?

Overheard in Bendheim:

(Discussing what English names to adopt) Chinese grad student 1: I can’t decide between Lucretia or Titania.
Chinese grad student 2: Go with one that would be good for your resume.

Overheard on Broadway Trip:

Girl, after prop auction: Do you know how many massages I could buy with $3,500?

Overheard in my room:

Nass editor’s roommate: If I had an English accent, I’d be capable of absolute devastation.

Overheard in T12 Patton:

Guy: Putting a case on your iPhone is like putting a burqa on your girlfriend.

Overheard in Charter bathroom:

Drunk girl 1: He wants your body.
Drunk girl 2, mournfully: No, it’s much worse! He wants my personality!

Overheard in Frist:

Fratstar, to other fratstar: Do you know me? If there is any way I can pay someone to fight my fights for me I’m going to do it.

Overheard on Pi Phi email list:

Fearless leader: The vodka,, gicwe to me and ti is yoursss

Overheard in Frist:

Bro, gravely: I’m probably not gonna get into Ivy when I bicker.
Other bro: What, yes you are!
Bro: Yeah I’m just fucking.

Overheard on Twitter:

CWR prof Colson Whitehead: I live two blocks from where I’m reading tonight. I can finish talking and totally be spankin’ it five minutes later. #metrics