He Died For Your Beads

February 22, 2007


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Overheard in Pyne

Guy: Morning wood is the body's way of keeping you from peeing at night. When you piss the bed when you're drunk, it's because you have whiskey dick and can't get it up.

Overheard in Cap & Gown

Girl: I think my dog misses her uterus.

Overheard in Terrace

Officer: I can't seem to zip up my fly these days.

Overheard in Brown Hall

Guy: I love uptown girls. I want to blow a line of them.

Overheard in Frist

Girl: If I had a toilet like that I'd never stop pooping

Overheard on Valentine’s Day

Girl 1: Iʼm thinking about taking orders.
Girl 2: What does that mean?
Girl 1: You know...becoming a nun.
Girl 2: Ohhhh. I thought you meant taking orders at a drive through window.

Overheard at Cloister

Guy: (in reference to the vagina monologues) So tomorrow is vagina day....
Girl: Every day is vagina day when youʼre a girl.