Caprice

December 6, 2012

Butterflies

I was eight, on the farm in India, catching butterflies. The pastel powder of their wings crumbled onto our fingers as we held them shut. We’d lift them up for examination, watch them wriggle, realize they were nothing but glorified ants, lose interest, forget we had lost interest and try to catch another one.

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De Sabbatina

At school, I no longer had to wait. I was free to do as I pleased and ceased observing the day altogether. But strangely, immediately, Shabbat presented itself to me in a transfiguring light, the radical antidote to all that displeased me here.

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Hellas Historic

Picture me this fall break, up on the Athenian acropolis, staring down the Parthenon, trying to figure out anything at all. It’s bright if that helps. I’m up there on a trip with Princeton’s Humanistic Studies Sequence. Written HUM, pronounced … Read More

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Facebook Frenzy

Are people afraid that their deepest darkest secrets will make their way into the hands of their mortal enemies? Why do we see one person’s post on Facebook and instantly delve into a tumultuous back and forth between the meager efforts to protect our photos and the nonchalant I-don’t-give-a-fuck shoulder shrug?

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No Shave November

As a man who is, how shall I say, genetically endowed with the gift of growing facial hair at a fast and heavy pace, I had always been a little curious about beard-growing.

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A Better Course Guide

Courses that take YOU

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Snapping Chats

What is Snapchat ? For those of you not savvy enough to keep up with the changing pace of the newest social media, Snapchat is an app, which allows users to send temporary pictures. The idea is that you can … Read More

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Playdates and Porn

Slowly, a faint hissing sound began to rise. The girls let out nervous giggles and looked around, shaking and sweating (in the form of a singular, gigantic sweat drop forming on each of their absurdly tiny anime noses). The hissing became louder, and we saw a yellowish haze rising around them.

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The Companionship of Charlie Brown

I am eight. It’s the holiday season, I am on winter break, and I am filled with bottomless guilt. My third-grade history textbook has disappeared—vanished somewhere in the bounds of our five hundred square foot portable modular building, immune to my powers of search.

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Read Receipt Manifesto

I, a frustrated child of this generation, nursed on, yet never quite weaned off of Technology’s teat, decry the current state of Digital Communication.

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Walking Fast

I, however, find myself on that latter side of the argument, in the shunned group of speedwalkers. Until now I had always wondered, faintly bothered, why people rarely talk about how wonderful a fast walk is. I personally enjoy them immensely. The problem was I couldn’t really say why, or convince anyone else, without using reasons I found depressingly mundane for the wonderful act: “it saves time.” “Because I can wake up 10 minutes later that way…”

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Annabelle, By the Pool

Before, she had felt as though of the night as a separate space—a sealed pocket of her life—but now she was reminded that everything that existed around the pool at daytime still stood by at night: the black hardtop of the basketball court, a racquetball wall, and the town Rec Center itself, a building which tomorrow would reveal to be little more than a grey dome without windows.

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Dear eXpressions

From our Student Group to Yours, an eXigent letter.

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The Second Death

A few weeks ago my friend Demi sat on the floor of my dorm room. She was the first person I had seen from my time studying abroad in Switzerland since I had come back to the U.S. almost two years ago. She hadn’t changed much, though I had, and when she said in the rough Swiss German I had missed so strongly, “er het sich verhängt,”—he had hanged himself— I thought to myself in a language I hadn’t spoken in years — “jetzt gibt’s zwei.” Now there are two.

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An Orientalist Fantasy

But the more I thought about this movie, the more I realized it simply gives an illusion of depth. A movie filmed with somewhat unconventional techniques, or featuring naturalistic dialogue and little plot, is automatically assumed to be “artsy” and thus philosophical, by association with the style of the French New Wave.

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An Interception

That long diagonal, from Point A to Point B, also happened to contain Point Me, somewhere in between.

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The Nass’s Classes

Real class -> Playful pejorative THR 201 : Beginning Studies/Acting -> “Shows for joes” ENG 206 : Reading Literature: Fiction -> “Plots for twats” POL 210 : Political Theory -> “Rules for tools” EGR 194 : Intro Engineering -> “Screws for Jews” JRN 445 : … Read More

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One Reader’s Beef with Buzzfeed.com

On Buzzfeed’s “About Us” page, the site claims to be “a new kind of media company for the social world. Our technology powers the viral distribution of content, detects what is trending on the web, and connects people in realtime with the hottest content of the moment. Our site is a rapidly growing hub for viral media that reaches over 13 million monthly unique visitors and our viral media network reaches an additional 200M.”

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Confessions IX

Am I handsome? There are days when my face is clear and my hair all in place and I believe that I am very comely, and there are days when I am unduly scruffy and pimpled and I despise my own reflection. I

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They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?

Every Thanksgiving, the rest of America puts a turkey in the oven and sprinkles marshmallows over sweet potatoes. They sleep in late, watch football. Or so I would imagine.

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Diving

You taught me to swim
years ago or thought so and so did I, yet
drowning comes much easier

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Playdates and Porn

It was a Thursday night, and my best friend Dana and I couldn’t think of anything to do. Our usual evening activities, as is probably true for many people aged nine, were of the destructive nature; we’d erect elaborate blanket … Read More

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A Better Course Guide

Courses that take YOU

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Verbatim

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Overheard on Graduate Student Events Calendar

Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament: Jan 26, 2013 ·5:30 p.m.– 8:00 p.m. Lawrence Apt. Parking Lot. Return to the times of old and be entertained whilst you feast! Dinner and entertainment are included. Cost of this event is $40. Transportation will be arranged by carpool – please RSVP and indicate whether you can drive yourself/others. Email Audrey at ****@princeton.edu to RSVP. Sponsored by the Graduate School.

Overheard in Studio 34

Archetypical bro: Why don’t we smoke and watch Workaholics and correct each others’ Spanish homework?

Overheard at Bridges precept

Humanities student: Is a rock really a rock or a fragment of our understanding of a rock?

Overheard on Facebook chat

Junior Pi Phi: Verbatim this week sucked.
Senior Pi Phi: That’s because we weren’t in it.

Overheard at Firestone

Security guard, to other security guard: Oh, Tracy? That girl easy like sleazy.

Overheard in Housing Office

Receptionist 1: So I said, a phone is a phone! It’s for calling!
Receptionist 2: So why’d you get an iPhone?
Receptionist 1: Because I wanted Instagram!

Overheard at St. A’s / Shere Khan Pregame

Boy: All of Instagram is here!

Overheard in Butler

Theta sophomore: Okay, I weighed myself before I peed, and I weighed myself after I peed, and it was a three pound difference.

Overheard on Prospect Avenue

Theta 1 (on phone): Tell him to make a roadie and meet us.
Theta 2 (to herself): A roadie to go..

Overheard in Whitman

AEPi sophomore: Stevie Nicks is forever.

Overheard on gchat

Hood politician: Chief keef would probably be republican: Strong belief in the 2nd amendment, capital punishment (see: lil jojo)

Overheard in Forbes

Critical sophomore: You know what I really hate? When I ask someone how old their baby is and they say 18 months. Bitch he’s one year old!

Overheard in 1580

English soldier: If plaine or homely, wee saie she is a doudie or a slut.

Overheard at Ivy

Senior, on first kisses: I think I kissed my Dominican babysitter when I was 7... She was like, 15 though, so it was cool. Her name was Domatila.