Celebrity love/Or infatuations/Haiku form, sometimes

We stole Professor Cornel West from Harvard. I Guess we’re not racist. Angela Hodgeman Sends work notices and draw announcements. Delete. CB, I’d like a Sandwich. But only if it’s Not too much to ask. Chapman likes to sing Aloud to himself on the streets. Please stop it, Chapman. Evan Baehr wishes That the world […]

Portrait of the Spatt as a Young Man

When I was a freshman in high school, my friend Annunziata invited me to spend President’s Day weekend at her grandmother’s house in Ocean Reef, a vacation spot in Key Largo, Florida.

Lost in Translation, Part 2

When last we left our valiant tourist, he was in a great deal of trouble, and no amount of Ramen would get him out of it. Andrew found that Japan was not the cuddly Pikachu he had once imagined, and was faced with the possibility of a cellmate turning him into his own personal Pokemon.

Untying the Knots

Everyone seems to at least know of John Mangual, especially former residents of Mathey College and current members of Terrace. He has a way of striking up unique conversations, pointing out unusual details of situations, and smiling with a friendly glow.

Celebrity Society Girl

It was 1.22am and I was talking to a friend of mine on IM while I was typing away at my JP at the same time. Then I got a barrage of IMs which said “Accept Message.”

StalkFest

Stalking someone is like sucking the marrow out of bones. It is disgusting both to watch and perform.

Portrtait of the Spatt as a Young Man

About six months after my mother died, my father figured it was time that he reengaged with society and start attending the various social functions that he had once pleasured.

Extremely Literary and Incredibly Alumni

About ten days ago, the Nassau Weekly’s editor in chief Jacob Savage interviewed (via telephone) Princeton’s most recent wunderkind, Jonathan Safran Foer ’99, author of the critically acclaimed best-seller Everything is Illuminated, and the recently published Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.

I Was a Teenage Baby Sitter

Radiant, apple-cheeked Zelda Harris was a high school senior when I first met her during Pre-Frosh Weekend 2003. We were standing together awkwardly with Amy Widdowson—Zelda’s host and a friend of mine—on the gray gravel path behind Nassau Hall that gets all murky and disgusting when it rains. And it had been raining—for days, if […]

The Phallic Fraternity

The films we watch, recorded images in motion, are brought to us by the camera’s privileged eye. The camera is privileged to “be there” when the actual moving bodies do their thing.

C-O-O-K-I-N-G with Rebecca Sealfon

St. Paul once wrote, “The letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.” Rebecca Sealfon ’05 probably would have kicked his ass.

The Insider Outsider

Being an outsider—or at least portraying yourself as one—pays in a Princeton USG presidential race. For the past three presidential elections, the USG Vice President has run and lost to a candidate that promised to be a breath of fresh air in the stale world of Princeton student government.

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