Take off your underwire bra and your prison tattoos. Thank you.

Put in these earplugs please. You’ll hear us; we’ll speak very loudly and with gestures.

Lie on this table (It is not a surgical table. Does it feel like one? How funny!) and relax.

Don’t move your head. Relax. We’ll help you. See, now you can’t move your head.

Look at this screen. Isn’t it close to your face?

The machine will make a lot of noise. Too much for the earplugs probably!

We’re sending you in now—remember it’s a very small space. Don’t move.

Yes relax, keeping that head still! A little to the left though. Yes that angle please. For an hour yes.

It will sound like it’s breaking but that’s normal.

I wonder what it would sound like if it actually broke! We wouldn’t know! Hahaha.

Press the buttons now please. No not those! Relax thank you.

This is going well. Just another few hours! You’re doing great don’t move.

Just imagine the fun you’ll have with thirty dollars!

We can see the whole brain. This would be very interesting to you if you could see it.

No sneezes!

A few more structural scans now. Lie back and watch this DVD. Do you like documentaries?

Once the leaves have closed around the fly, the battle is unwinnable.

Wow I bet you can see this really clearly with the screen so close!

I have to ask you not to move. No talking please.

At this point, struggling will only make things worse.

Gruesome! Again though, don’t try to speak at this stage.

After 10 days the plant reopens to reveal the desiccated husk of the insect.

NO TALKING. We’re going to have to start all over again.

I wish you had stayed still. We could have done this much faster.