Overheard in Lecture

Professor: A while ago, I went with a Soviet research team to northeast Siberia. It was a little chaotic. Probably because the Soviet Union was collapsing at the time.

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Overheard on a Thursday night

Friend 1, texting: Do you want me to bring the bong.

Friend 2: No, it’s all good.

Friend 1, arriving: Sorry, I didn’t see your text. I brought it anyway. I also brought my popcorn maker.

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Overheard in lecture

Jeff Nunokawa: Your grandparents will remember this, if they're not dead

Jeff Nunokawa, later: Tell your grandparents this. They'll die

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Overheard in TI

Fast fashion proponent: It's uncouth to wear the same thing everyday

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Overheard outside McCosh

Woke Humanist: I was in the diversity seminar for English majors who didn't want to read Black authors – Irish Studies.

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Overheard in lecture

Distracted student ignoring lecture, texting: *sends link to article on the risks of magic mushrooms* Well I guess we're sticking to edibles then

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Overheard outside Firestone

Disillusioned campus conservative: I’m so done with this school. I should have just gone to PragerU.

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Overheard in Forbes

Curious first year: What do you do in Sustainable Investments Club? Does anyone there actually care about sustainability?

Sold-out first year: I think sustainability's nice.

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Overheard on Prospect

Frat-coded guy: Dude, are you a Gemini?

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Overheard in Astro Lecture

Desperately relevant chem professor: Trigger Warning: Chemistry!

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Overheard between loving couple

Boyfriend: There should be a cooking show where everyone moans.

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Overheard under the Wright Hall archway

Baseball player: You could die like now. Sometimes I think about that during the day.

Other baseball player: *silent, pensive nod*

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Overheard over text

Junior on vacation: Just played blackjack with a BILLIONAIRE.

Junior on vacation, forty minutes later: Peep the mani/pedi.

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Overheard by the SPIA fountain

European grad student: We might need an alternative, yes, but if they're not selling crates and barrels at Crate and Barrel I will be VERY disappointed.

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Overheard in the Forbes lobby

Freshman: I miss when Brandy Melville was body-negative

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Overheard in the Forbes dining hall

Frosh, scrolling through phone: "I should major in Instagram reels."

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Overheard in Kwanza yet again

Desperate international students: “Who do you love the most?”

UK/US Passport Holder: “I'll marry ALL of you!”

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Overheard in eating club common space

Guy: “What are you guys going to be for Halloween?”

Girl 1: “I need a prompt, what’s relevant right now?”

Girl 2: “We could be geoexchange whores. Or the ghost of Poe Field?”

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Overheard late at night in the Murray-Dodge Café

Incredulous girl: can you imagine THIS being your cousin, and being SURPRISED she’s a bisexual?

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Overheard while viewing South Tower impact footage

Viewer: 9/11 is my Roman Empire

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Overheard while planning a pregame

Pre-med student: I would do homework AT the orgy

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Overheard while still arguing about pickles

Detractor: What’s the moral imperative for pickling a child?

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Overheard while reflecting on origins

Former baby: Well, when I was a gamete, I was fairly nude

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Overheard in seminar

English concentrator: They were stabbed in a very romantic way

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Overheard in the co-op

Vegetarian: I feel like eggs are a constitutional issue

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