Heard in Prof. Foster’s ART 214

Nothing is more degrading than a clown shitting in a stall.

1 0

Overheard in 1927

She would kill me if she found out that I spread my stuff all over her bed.

0 0

Overheard in Chancellor Green

Josh Boak? No, he’s not Jewish, he’s just funny-looking.

0 0

Overheard in Lockhart

Sometimes, I feel like an automatic blowjob machine.

0 0

Overheard in Lockhart

Guy 1: You should just be her big talking dildo.
Guy 2: That’s all I ever wanted to be...except for the talking part.

2 0

Overheard from Prof. Lamb in ENG320

Pedophilia is different from slavery.

0 0

Overheard at Charter

If I had a little sister, I’d be in jail already.

0 3

Overheard on Elm Street

I wouldn't mind if my house got broken into, but I would mind if I didn't get to fuck the Pope this summer.

2 0

Overheard in Prospect Gardens

It’s not about being disabled. It’s about Minnesota.

0 0

Overheard in Holder

I’m thinking of giving out blowjobs for Lent.
Don’t you mean you’re thinking about giving them up?
No.

2 0

Overheard in Murray-Dodge

What? Sex makes you fat? Well then it’s a good thing I’m not having sex, because I’ve already gained seven pounds this year.

0 0

Overheard in Butler

When I’m sucking a guy’s dick, I sort of like to be able to gag. I don’t know, I guess it’s just comforting.

0 0

Overheard in Terrace

I don’t smoke, I just see things sometimes.

0 0

Overheard in Forbes

New Hampshire is the sweating vagina of New England.

1 0

Overheard in WWS 301

I don’t think old people are useless, I just find it easier to kill them.

0 0

Overheard in CLA208

This book is truly pathetic and not really useful. I would strongly encourage you not to look at it... But it’s mandatory.

0 0

Bill Nye in AST 203

Astrology is evil and bad. I’m not trying to be judgemental, I’m just saying.

0 0

Prof. Tyson in AST 203

Pluto is moonwhipped.

0 0

Overheard in Holder

I think when I die I want to be buried with my hands on my nuts.

0 0

Overheard in Rocky Dining Hall

At Yale they have this club where people get together, eat fried chicken, and watch pornos every Friday.
Wait, isn’t that at Quad?

0 0

Overheard in Edwards

Well, if I have to stay, can I at least take my shirt off?

0 0

Overheard in PJ’s Pancake House

I don’t want to sleep with him... I just want to measure it.

1 0

Overheard in Holder

There is gonna be so much pussy at my funeral.

0 0

Overheard in the E-Quad

Do computers suck because they’re guys, or do guys suck because they’re computers?

0 0

Overheard in Lourie-Love Lounge

I could have scored last night, but I had to wake up early.

0 0