Overheard outside East Pyne

President Christopher Eisgruber: I feel pressure

43 

Overheard on Elm Drive

*8-year-old throws snowball at group of passing students*
Students: Hey!!
8-year-old: Harvard's better.

34 

Overheard leaving TI

Soph to crying friend: What hole would he fill for you except for your vagina?

32 

Overheard in Frist

Stressed-out sophomore: I'll be honest, I think I probably have a solid cry about once a month. Usually in the shower. Put on some sad music and just go for it. That way I'm not wasting time. I mean, we all have to shower.

24 

Overheard in TI

Senior woman: Scandinavia’s great, but it’s so homogenous that if you show up and you’re short, fat and you have brown hair, they’re going to be like…no.
Newcomer: Are you talking about Pi Phi?

24 

Overheard in the library

Senior girl, reflecting on Kant: The next time I'm making out with someone on the street, I'm going to ask them, excuse me, do you see me as a means or an end?

23 

Overheard on Nassau Street

Journalism intern: You're a different person now.
Investment banking intern: I'm the same person. Just with more Excel shortcuts.

23 

Overheard in a bed

Woman 1: It's crazy how easy it is to have a civil, friendly meal with people you profoundly dislike.
Woman 2, cheerfully: That's the magic of TI!

22 

Overheard in dorm room

Jewish Marxist A's Ivy junior: I love the Nass verbatims, they're so relatable.

22 

Overheard outside Frist

Orange Key guide: Princeton Preview is a great chance to sleep with a student.

20 

Overheard in the Siberian wilderness

Fulbright Fellow: Last time I drank too much I went skinny dipping with a group of seventy-year-old men and vomited freshly slain sheep heart in my mouth.

19 

Overheard en route to Frist

Sophomore Ivy hopeful wearing a Canada Goose: I'm sorry I'm a man of the people and I don't know how to spell Moncler.

19 

Overheard in Iowa

Fuckboy, to feminist: I feel like at this point your definition of “fuckboy” is so broad that it applies to any male person.

19 

Overheard in Wu

Sophomore Pi Phi: After working on a problem set with two bros, I had to join Princeton Students for Gender Equality.

18 

Overheard in psychology precept

Preceptor, to junior girl: Do you want to work with these two guys for the group project?
Junior girl: Can I just work alone?

18 

Overheard en route to Funday

Sophomore Theta 1: My biggest fear is failure.
Sophomore Theta 2: Mine is chlamydia.

18 

Overheard in the bathroom

Girl, looking in mirror, whispering: Sad… No! Repress repress repress!

18 

Overheard in Wilson dining hall

Random Frosh: I feel like he's one of those people who thinks he's really talented because he's really rich.

17 

Overheard at Fashion Speaks

White junior on the whiteness of Shere Khan: Honestly this is worse than the Tory.

17 

Overheard outside Firestone during midterms

Four-year-old girl, to father: It doesn’t feel very fun here, Dada.

17 

Overheard in Bed, Bath, and Beyond

Marxist, looking at a display of toothpastes: This is why I hate capitalism; I'd rather the government just tell me what kind of toothpaste is best.

16 

Overheard during REL261 precept

Student: *sneezes twice*
Sixth-year grad student preceptor: They warned us during graduate student orientation. The freshmen will get sick and spread it to us.

16 

Overheard in 1903

SWUG, reading her ex's Facebook status: Anyone want to make latkes? Also, I'm bisexual.

16 

Overheard at Aquinas Retreat

Religious boi to complete stranger: I had a dream about hell last night and you were there.
Complete stranger: What the fuck, man

16 

Overheard in Firestone

SWUG: I can't find out I'm pregnant the night before my Bridges midterm.

15