(We are in a stable. Each actor has consumed between eight and fifteen 5-Hour Energies.)
AN ANGEL: Hark!
AN ANGLE: Organic robots! Range-free!
SIXTEEN SMALL TO MEDIUM SIZED T-SHIRTS: (wave in the wind)
NARRATOR: L! (pause here) M! (pause here) N! (pause here) O! (no pause here.)
ORATOR: Who invited the plague?
(The stage takes a short nap.)
THE CULT OF THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD: (chanting) Truth. Truth. Truth. Truth. Truth. Truth.
(They bring out THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD. It is a laminated airplane safety card.)
THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD: But I am Thoth!
(Planet-wide electrical failure.)
(A cool breeze)
AN ORCHESTRA: (wishes it was A PHILHARMONIC)
A PHILHARMONIC: (is AN ORCHESTRA)
HEIDI KLUM: Auf Wiedersehen.
*Acts 2, 6 and 7 were donated to Locks of Love