Girl 1: What was his name again?
Girl 2: Stalin.
Disenchanted reviewer: Princeton is full of snobs! Besides the architecture of the school, the town has only 2 blocks worth seeing. The hospital is nothing like the TV show House, and no he does not work there! 4 blocks off the college is where the illegal immigrants gather and wait for day work. I was extremely disappointed in Princeton. I imagined a European type university village centered on a school with great prestige! Yeah, NO! not even close.
RCA, to zees: I just ravage girls.
Guy 1: Some guy in my physics class got a 93 on the midterm.
Guy 2: Is he Asian?
Guy 1: No, he’s just a normal-looking kid.
Freshman: irregardless of pronunciation motifs of delineation and irregardless of how it activates senses it evokes provocative thoughts of malignant growths
Boy, to friends: I think I’m going to need to break it off with this girl. I don’t think I can handle a long-distance relationship.
Friend: Dude, she lives in Forbes.
CWR prof Colson Whitehead: I live two blocks from where I’m reading tonight. I can finish talking and totally be spankin’ it five minutes later. #metrics
I’m the News Editor at the Prince and we read some material you wrote for the Nass and were impressed. We like you to think about joining News staff this semester and reaching an even wider audience.
News is holding its open houses at 7 PM next Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday night in our offices at 48 University Place. We’ll tell you about the application process for joining the section and be around to answer the questions.
I hope to see you there, Teddy
German aesthete: The army’s just a big frat.
Brunette person: I’m working in Frist on Wednesday night and there are people coming back from the Street--blonde people.
Drunk girl: I worked from 10-5.
Drunk dude spitting incoherent game: Better than 10-8.
P-Safe officer to other P-Safe officer: What’s up mofo?
Rhodes Scholar: Both the black Rafaels I know are black.
Bearded dude: I got strep throat from a long line of dicks.