Terrace senior man, eating Olives lemon square: “Marx is my daddy.”
Previously Verbatim-ed Sophomore French Student: *coughs*
Professor: "Be careful, or you'll be back in the Nassau Weekly."
Struggling CBE freshman
"Pop tarts are sugar ravioli!"
Dream Self: Hmm.. Princeton should really divest from fossil fuels…
Enlightened freshman: It's a new season. It's a Christian Girl Fall.
Nass Sophomore: There's this girl writing about climate protest music.
Non-Nass Sophomore: That's so college.
Beer-soaked frosh at State Night: Is it acceptable to go to Ivy like this?
Tower man, wearing plaid: They need a good dose of shut the fuck up.
Senior man crushing junior woman's dreams: He's not athletic; he's in Wawa United.
Exasperated white girl: If your dog looks like a rat, then it is one.
Cannon Junior: Why does eduroam work better here than in my room?
Thoughtful sophomore: Jesus would have been a VSCO girl.
Gay freshman: These poppers are going to be a hit at Terrace.
Ethnic woman: Is it xenophobic if it’s my own culture?
Asian man, resigning himself to Colonial: I have too many p-sets to do to defy stereotypes.
MFA student, offhandedly: Well, when I get my Pulitzer…
German Major: Isn't White Claw just spiked La Croix??
Other German Major: You're the reason society is a simulation.
UK Fellowships Applicant: In theory, I always thought I would sell out, but I'm shocked that I haven't in practice.
Soph 1: I’ve decided we HAVE to go to Oktoberfest this year.
Soph 2: Is that at Charter?