Junior Editor to managing editor: I just bcc’ed you
I’ve never done that before
I think I need to take a shower
Nass web editor: I can name all the great Russian writers... have you ever read Nabokov ?
Nass managing editor, screaming: WE WILL NOT BURN BRIDGES WITH DAVID REMNICK
Excited junior: Ever since I started Juuling I've made so many new friends!
Supreme Court justice, Sonia Sotomayor: And that’s how I got to Princeton... I got fooled.
Architecture Junior: I broke his heart and his knee in the same day.
UPC Jew: My school had one day of sex but it was on Rosh Hashana so I missed it.
PSafe officer to religious protestors: Yeah… we're actually more worried about these kids coming after you guys.
Supreme Court justice, on being famous in public: I have to be careful at the beach now.
Person 1: Music is just marketing.
Person 2: Could you elaborate?
Person 1: Not really, no.
Former Pi Phi: The only things on my list of things I hate are tunics and tattoos of people's faces. The only things I love are unconventional couples that actually work really well together.
White privilege Cap icon after parents weekend: Fuck, I forgot to ask my parents for cash to pay for my weed.
Catholic boi, probably: Hey Alexa, wake me up at 8 a.m. with “Smash Mouth” by All Star.
Sophomore on the come-up: I'm lowkey always the alpha. I'm a Great White, bitch.
Junior who is OVER IT: It's not a Terrace shirt. Some of us just wear tie dye.
Frosh 1, on ancestry.com: I'm interested in my heritage.
Frosh 2: You're white as fuck.
Sophomore: I don't buy the trinity thing. Jesus ain't God.
Friend: Can I interest you in Islam?