Design editor on lack of verbatims: Everyone is too busy to say dumb shit.
Man wearing safari hat: What do you think of cannibalism? I think I want to be eaten.
Gay sophomore: I feel like I'm doing a disservice to society by not having kids.
Male passenger: Is that associated with gayness?
Princeton student: Meerkats? No.
Tour guide, to tour group: I actually have a grad student friend and she's really jealous of all the opportunities we have.
There was this summer in high school when me and my best friend only spoke to each other in Okkervil River lyrics.
I just feel like the kind of people who join Terrace are the kind of people who browse Reddit, and the people who browse Reddit love cats.
Beleaguered sophomore male: I will be living in the slums with cockroaches and worse yet, two Zetes. THIS is the real "housing crisis."
Kanye West: By the way, I don't know the days of the week. I just do to exactly when my appointment is.
Freshman writing seminar student: My biggest problem at this point in the writing process is that I have no desire, motivation, or interest to write this essay, or even be in this class for that matter.
Girl, agitated: No, I'm not going to clean the room because I'm a girl.
WWS major: But Woody Woo is just like that because we don't study anything. I think in a real major you study real things.
Grad student, sheepishly, to Terrace Officer: Do you mind if I bum some toilet paper from Terrace? I ran out at my place.
Sage: Men in glass houses shouldn't throw stones...or masturbate during the day.
Frenchman: I don't think [Redacted] is gay.
Nassman: Oh, why's that?
Frenchman: Because he doesn't seem hopelessly in love with me.
Girl 1, exasperated: You know what I have to stop doing? Eating.
Girl 2: I know. It's so bad.