Nass’s Classes

November 17, 2011


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Overheard at SAE pregame:

[Pi Phi pledge reads aloud Campus Safety Alert about the campus masturbator] Other Pi Phi pledge: Well ... do you think he was hot?

Overheard at SAE Pregame:

SAE pledge, to other SAE pledge, sheepishly: Yo, I don’t mean this in a gay way, but if anal sex is like backwards pooping, that sounds kind of awesome.

Overheard in Ivy:

Ivy senior, rolling an Ivy pass into a cigarette filter: This is like the social equivalent of burning a $100 bill.

Overheard in Holder Basement:

Sophomore boy: I know that word from Civ IV.

Overheard in Terrace:

Terrace girl: I got really mad the other day about the Orange and Black Ball.
Terrace guy: Why?
Terrace girl: It’s super heteronormative. The advertising is all, “Get your hetero date.”
Terrace guy: ... Is it?

Overheard in MOL 101:

Professor: I don’t know how much you guys who are taking this class for a grade care about cancer--but you old auditors in the back probably do!

Overheard in study area:

Guy 1: Some guy in my physics class got a 93 on the midterm.
Guy 2: Is he Asian?
Guy 1: No, he’s just a normal-looking kid.

Overheard in Pi Phi Pledge’s inbox:

Elder Pi Phi: Really important pledge task!! [Redacted] and I need two girls to wax our barbours

Overheard in Pyne:

Muggle 1: But I wouldn’t want to have powers all the time, right?
Muggle 2: Yeah!
Muggle 1: Because then people would, like, ask me to help them.

Overheard in Spelman:

Guy 1: My AAS preceptor is from Trinidad and—
Guy 2: What does he know about being African-American?

Overheard in Cottage Library:

Girl: I don’t read books.

Overheard in Whitman:

Girl: He smells like Cheetos 100% of the time and is really hairy and sweats in cold air. We went on a date, and he ate like six cannolis.