Guy: Why is there tinsel in your hair?
Dude With Tinsel in Hair: 'tis the season! 'tis the season!
Drunk Guy: Think about homicide - you're not really killing a homosexual, you know?
Girl: If you could rape me in a paddle boat, I would give you props, cause that would be really hard.
Frosh: So you're telling me you are going to contaminate all the condoms in the world and make your own army?
Looking at pictures of assassinated JFK
EIC 1: He was awfully handsome.
EIC 2: Even in death.