Guy 1: It's just Febreeze, man, chill out!
Guy 2: I'm gonna fuck you up!
Girl: You know, I don't think I would really mind if I didn't have any free will.
Writer 1: Great show! I want to have all of your babies!
Writer 2: One-child policy.
Frat Guy 1: That girl was so stupid.
Frat Guy 2: But that's the best kind!
Preceptor: Anybody have an idea which variable to use?
Physics Major: Does your friend have an idea?
Preceptor: Probably not... he's an economist.