Invasion of Privacy

April 15, 2018

Verbatim

More →

Overheard at Ivy

Reformed prepster: In high school, I had a playlist called vineyard crimes.

Overheard on Nassau

Junior Terran: The only time I ever snorted Adderall, I hung out with neo-Nazis. They were surprisingly so normal.

Overheard at Ivy dinner

Australian soph: Más Flow just makes me think of my period.

Overheard in Ivy

Ivy soph, after learning he was younger than the frosh with whom he was speaking: Well I’m a member here so…

Overheard on business major’s computer

YouTube search bar: how to treat people

Overheard in Rocky

STN-less soph: I'm really into pie charts these days... like, emotional pie charts.

Overhead in Forbes

Sleep-deprived frosh, at 3 a.m.: I'm so pale because of the weather that I'm actually beginning to experience white privilege.

Overheard in GroupMe

Soph woman: Come to TI to watch straight men shake their hips like they haven't told a lie in their lives.

Overheard in a JRN class

Nass editor: I have really good musk.

Overheard at TI

Jewish man: I’m flexing to stay warm.

Overheard in Cuyler

Press Club co-president: I don't think I ever really learned how to write an essay.

Overheard in Terrace

Small-town soph: Flavored condoms are like … the worst.

Overheard in Whitman

Homesick New England soph: If Tom Brady retires before I graduate I'm dropping out.

Overheard before walk of shame

Fuckboy # 324: If there is anything I can do to make your stays more pleasant, please do let me know.

Overheard in Forbes

Senior woman looking at a poster: MAVRIC is like a group that organizes events to help men be less shitty men.
Zete junior: Believe it or not, that's also the mission statement of Zeta Psi.

Overheard in 1903

Senior female: I just don’t identify with the word “pussy.”

Overheard in Studio

Random soph: Thesis fairying is like social security. You pay into it for three years and then you get less than expected when you're a senior.

Overheard over coffee

Philosophy major: Moms are a lot like 3D printers. . . . I heard that in a TED talk.

Overheard in Montreal

Former events editor: This is an advanced bakery.