Happy Valentine’s Day!

February 12, 2004

Verbatim

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Overheard in Wu Dining Hall

Guy 1: You need to find a girl or you'll be going out with your right hand
for life.
Guy 2: But living in a world of fantasy porn is so much fun!

Overheard upstairs at Charter

Young Woman: Take off that turtleneck, hot stuff.
Young Man: Anything you say, baby.
Young Woman: Why're you wearing a second turtleneck underneath your turtleneck?
Young Man: Have you lost interest yet?

Overheard at ivy club during initiations

jewish guy 1: dude there are so many hot girls i want to have sex with here
jewish guy 2: i just want to have sex with the club
jewish guy 3: well, jewish guy 2, if you had a drill you could make hole in the floor over there and go at it

Overheard at the Nurse’s Desk at McCosh

Nurse: Let's try this again- why do you want me to "slather" your chest with Vick's Vap-O-Rub?
Freshman: Because I lost my allergy medicine and I'm congested.
Nurse: You're lying.
Freshman: Can't you at least pats me tummy?

Overheard in Mathey dining hall

so he'd try to trick me sometimes. he'd be kissing me lower and lower and then i'd be like, no no i get what you're trying to do.