Freshman: He uses the word — wait, can I swear? Ass.
ML Catholic, upon hearing about Uber Helicopter: What?! What is this?? Money is the root of all evil.
Disgruntled study buddy: If you can’t offer lo-fi sex music, why are we friends?
Freshman boy to girl, romantically: Have you ever been to the towpath? Apparently it's very nice.
Geographically inept freshman: Why don't you have a southern drawl?
South Dakota native: I'm not from the South.
Theta junior: We need to take a moment to talk about Timothée Chalamet – he's so hot!
Theta soph: Wait, let me tigerbook him.
Frosh starting tech week: Do you ever get blueballed but like emotionally?
Guy walking out of Tower: Fine, go to Charter Friday. Fine, hate yourself. It's fine.
Non-Catholic: If you get drunk at the Aquinas Center, is it a sin?
Student: Wait, is Macaulay Culkin in TI??
Blade CEO: Typical Princeton kids... reading without their lips moving.
Frosh to friend, describing problematic male: He just mansplains a lot.
Friend: I kinda like that though.
White girl: This tastes like bug spray.
White boy, matter-of-factly: Yeah, that's just IPAs in general.
Frosh to friend, preparing for their first Princetoween: Nooo, I don't wanna be slutty Harry Potter!
Lonely frosh: Tell me why these curly fries are the only constant in my life right now.
Prospective study abroad student: Does Norway even have religion?
Their friend: Uh, yea. Norse mythology. Thor.
Bro: There is a feminist literature on…uh…of peace.