Department Secretaries Tell All

October 4, 2001

Verbatim

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Joyce Carol Oates, CWR 203

You don’t have to have a bad opium trip to write well.

Preceptor Anne Margaret Daniel, ENG345

Naturalism is like realism on drugs.

Professor Wolff, ENG345

We’re not talking about oysters here. We’re talking about syphilis.

Overheard at Frist Campus Center

He must have been really drunk if he admitted that he was a Mormon.

Overheard in Brown

Girl 1: How much semen is on that futon?
Girl 2: Well, as far as I’m concerned, mean people suck and nice people swallow, and I’m a nice girl.

Overheard in Spelman

Maybe I do want to be an academic. Whenever I go into Firestone and see all those books it makes me want to come in my pants.

Overheard outside Mathey dining hall

If I’m going to rush, I better stick to salads.

Overheard in POL 310

Boy: Yeah, Robbie George, the bigot, teaches Con Interp.
Girl: Oh, no, he’s not a bigot. He’s a really strict Catholic.

Overheard about ELE491 Lecturer, Ed Zschau

He can destroy you. He’s like Aaron Spelling.

Professor Cadden in THR 331, On Puritans’ critique of Elizabethan Theater

They just go on and on and ON about the sex - it’s fabulous!

Prof. Cadden, THR 331

Student: isn’t “occurrence” referring to sex?
Cadden: Well, (thumbs up) dirty mind at 9:30 - way to go.

Professor Wolff, ENG345, on Hedda Gabler

In the production I saw, when she committed suicide, the blood splattered on General Gabler’s portrait...I thought that was quite nice.

Prof. Taylor, AAS391

I am African American. I realize I probably look white and Jewish to most of you... There was some fooling around back there in the slave age.